


The Eye of the Beholder

by JayBarou



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: AU, Frostiron Bang 2015, M/M, Seven Deadly Sins, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-06
Updated: 2015-11-06
Packaged: 2018-04-29 09:41:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 43,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5123087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayBarou/pseuds/JayBarou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor was banished to Midgard, he got instantly kidnapped, which pushed Loki to decide that saving his brother was more important than asking about his origins. However, someone in Midgard might make a game of tempting him away from his goal.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Knowledge; the Original One

***

***

 

Everything had gone more or less according to Loki’s plans, until their incursion to Jotunheim had become a cruel joke. The consequences showed later, when the golden dome of the Bifrost was the same bright, over-adorned structure as always, but it didn’t have the same splendor Loki remembered. Nothing was the same, not even him, how could he be?! When he was… his skin was… _Slay the giants!_ was the resonating noise in his head, awakening fears that he couldn’t begin to fathom.

While Loki's mind was turning time and again, the Bifrost pulled a mortal Thor in, banishing him to Midgard. Loki should have been concerned; in a different situation, he would have tried to change things, but in Loki’s head the noise was still _slay the Jotnar, all the Jotnar!_ So he couldn’t help but feel a little safer with Thor gone. He walked the rainbow bridge, shoulders tense and his father by his side. Odin, the greatest warrior, to whom the Jotnar had succumbed. Was the skin contagious? A curse? It was… a possibility, right? No need to think the worst.

“Father, we must have words.” Loki was quite proud of how he reigned in his nerves.

Odin, on the other hand, was in no mood to coddle his youngest; he grumbled and increased his pace.

Loki understood it, but he wasn’t going to be denied answers now. If Odin wouldn't answer, Loki would go to the vault where the casket had been slowly wilting without the touch and care of those monsters. He could use it to know the truth, to know if he was the prince of Asgard or one of those… things.

“Your majesty,” Heimdall only raised his voice slightly, but it made Odin turn and listen more effectively than Loki. “Thor has disappeared.”

“What?” Loki turned too, despite his own conundrum.

“I can’t see him on Midgard.” The guardian looked around searchingly. “I can’t see him on any realm.”

“That can’t be right,” Odin whispered.

The king of gods rushed to the throne, Hlidskjalf, from where he could see even more than Heimdall. Loki trailed behind, concerned for Thor, but worry not quite as prominent as morbid curiosity. Odin pushed everyone in his way until he reached the throne and he got the usual faraway look he had when he used it for more than symbolic purposes.

“He… he isn’t there.” Odin’s frown deepened. “I can’t see him.” Loki noticed his shoulders slumping. “This is my fault,” He looked around, still unseeing. “I must send, find…”

Odin was sitting when the Odinsleep overpowered him and Loki only had to keep him from falling to the floor. The throne room was crowded and staring, but Loki still had to shout for help before anyone dared to move. Damned Asgardians and their lack of anything remotely similar to initiative.

The healers came and took Odin out of the court’s prying eyes. Loki walked by the unconscious body to the double doors. In the hall he looked both ways. He could turn right, go to the vault now and seek the truth, but he could also turn left. Thor was missing, his… Thor had gotten into problems in the first two minutes in Midgard, and the person who might help… Loki turned left.

Frigga had been absent during the events of the day, coronation aside. It wasn’t unusual; she was in charge of all the tasks that Odin considered menial, so she had very little free time, not even for her children… her child. Despite the apparent isolation, the sad hug with which she welcomed Loki meant that she already knew about Thor and Odin. Her shield maidens were known as the most effective in the castle for a reason.

Loki returned the hug, taking advantage of the feeling of being her son. Maybe everything was a curse, but if it wasn’t… well. Loki pulled away and looked at her properly. She had been about to leave in search of Odin’s bedside; the way she looked behind Loki confirmed it.

“Mother,” Loki said, putting his hands on her upper arms. “Odin is fine, but you must help me find Thor. He is hidden from Heimdall and he is human now.”

She shook her head. “You can’t go to him; you have to rule Asgard, my boy, someone has to. Thor will be fine.”

Loki frowned lightly, “Asgard is your burden now, mother, I need to find Thor. I’ve never been the chosen prince to sit on the throne, but I’ve been his brother for as long as my memory goes.”

“Who will look after your father?” She looked at the hall again.

“Mother! He will have the best healers of the realm, but Thor needs us and Asgard needs you.”

“Loki.” She looked at him instead of the corridor for, maybe, the first time. “This hastiness is not usual in you. What ails you?”

“Now is not the time, mother.” Loki was used to putting the good of Asgard and the good of Thor before his own wants.

“Nonsense. You forget who you are talking to. What ails you?” she repeated.

“We were in Jotunheim…” Loki relented and his face must have done something without his consent before trailing off, because Frigga instantly knew.

“Oh, my child.” She hugged him, but he was stiff.

“It is true, then,” Loki said in a level voice.

She hugged tighter. Loki noted that it wasn’t an answer and waited until she had gathered her thoughts. “Odin sought me in the middle of the battle,” she finally started, hiding in the hug. “He said he had found a child and we decided to keep you when the troops came back. You were so fragile among such destruction.”

“I’m the enemy.”

“NO.” Frigga almost shouted, pulling away from the stiff hug. It came out choked.

Loki pushed Frigga further away, as his anger rose. “I’m _the_ monster. Thor and I grew up dreaming of slaying giants, monsters, like me-”

“No, my child, you are no monster, don’t think yourself so, you were brought up to slay enemies, like any warrior, but Frost Giants are no longer our-”

“They are! WE are! I am the monster that every warrior in the realm uses as target practice.” Loki’s anger peaked. “I _am_ the monster in everybody’s eyes; what you or I think of myself doesn’t matter. All of Asgard hates who I really am. Even you and Odin told us to hate…”

“LOKI!” Frigga was no longer warmth and understanding. It paradoxically calmed Loki’s anger in somewhat. “Odin took the Jotun prince home, as the king he is, to use you. _I_ took you in as my son. I did everything I could to keep you as mine; I fought with your father to have you here. I prevailed. That is why you are here and not gone and sent to Jotunheim to be their king in Odin’s name.

“ _I_ never told you to slay Jotuns, and I will have words with whoever did. I told you to be prepared against them. Loki, you are my son to the last consequences. No Jotun will love a son of Frigga, for I caused much destruction during the war. Just like Thor, you needed to be warned. I also warned you against high places, and fire giants, and many other dangerous things, because I am your mother, and I care.”

Loki looked into her eyes, attempting to find the lie.

“I see,” he said, not finding much fault in her. “I can find reasons in my heart to forgive you, eventually, but don’t ask me to share my love with Odin. For you and I have tried to have a family that he never sought; I struggled for the pride of an unwilling father.”

Loki looked at the ground and his mother rubbed his arm, unsure if more would be welcome.

“Odin is your father, however reluctantly. He has shaped you as much as I have. Maybe you don’t like it, but you can’t deny it either.”

Loki was going to keep asking, about his real parents, about his real body, about who knew, but then Thor plagued his thoughts once more.

“Thor… does he know?”

“No, not yet, and he won’t know for now.” Loki looked into her eyes, suspecting her of being ashamed of Loki. She didn’t give him time to doubt. “I’m not going to tell him if he has been told to slay giants as you have. Things will have to change.”

Loki stayed silent for a moment.

“I have to help him.”

“Loki, I did what I thought was right. I know I have caused you great pain with my decisions, I know Asgard doesn’t welcome you and your bornland doesn’t either. Now I see I should have avoided this very situation telling you sooner. I hope you can forgive me.”

“Thor needs me.” Loki insisted.

He really wanted to forgive her, but it was too soon; he was angry, and confused, and he needed to talk to Odin, who was oh-so-conveniently asleep. Loki could wait. Until then, he let Thor’s situation wash over any other feelings.

“Thor is still in Midgard.” Frigga told him when she was convinced that he wouldn’t forgive her just yet. “I foresee you going to look for him there.”

“That is not enough. I could go and find nothing.”

“That is all I can see, my child. Thor’s future is hidden to me.”

“Not dark?” Loki frowned. “Not unsure? Tainted in death? Divided in paths?”

“No, his choices are usually very easy to track, but there is someone hiding him and his future.”

Loki paced the chamber. Nothing made sense. “There must be something else.” He paced back. “I can go to the place you suggest, but that is not enough.”

“Come with me, I want to see your father with my own eyes.”

Loki didn’t like the idea, but he went with her and he glared at Odin as soon as he crossed the doors. He spent the next minutes pacing at the feet of the odinsleep patient. There had to be something he could do that didn’t involve following a vague prophecy of his mother. He knew of ways to trace people with magic, but as a prince, everyone made sure that it wasn’t possible. There weren’t traces of blood or locks of hair that a conspirator could use against the house of Odin. Loki could have traced Mjolnir, but the link between Thor and the weapon was severed.

The door opened some servants were holding Gungnir to Loki, but he stepped backwards pointedly and looked at Frigga, who sighed before taking it.

“Are you sure? This is your chance to prove yourself.”

“I have been proving myself for all my life, measuring up to a lie. This is yours.”

She took the spear regally between her strong, magic-bitten hands. Gungnir was made to be hers, even if it the chore was taken reluctantly. Power suited her well; the Friggaforce (for as long as she stayed on the throne) swirled a vibrant blue around her.

“The force!” Loki was reminded. “You can command the hammer.” He looked at his mother and he saw understanding lighting up her features.

“Go. Give me the signal when you are ready.”

Loki nodded and ran to the Bifrost as fast as he could, shouting an offhanded “to the hammer” to Heimdall before going to Midgard in a mad dash that would have made his oafish brother jealous.


	2. Knock Again

It was night in Midgard, and Mjolnir looked sad, lonely, and ominous in the middle of the crater. To Loki, though, it looked like a ray of hope in the middle of the dark. He slid down the side of the crater to look at it from all angles. It didn’t seem to have been tampered with.

Loki was aware that Heimdall, Frigga, and Odin were probably looking his way, but he couldn’t resist the draw of trying to lift the hammer. It was a childish impulse considering that Mjolnir’s enchantment of worth was made for Thor, but he didn’t refrain from trying, and he was accordingly disappointed.

With a sigh, he clutched both hands on the handle and called Frigga, who restored the link between tool and holder from realms away. The hammer sparked with a life of its own in Loki’s grip and it took to the sky, pulling Loki along and straining his shoulders.

The journey was mostly tedious, except for when he left the clouds behind, let the protective spells drop, and lights of unknown cities brightened up his night. Midgard had certainly grown since the last time Loki visited. It wasn’t as bright as Alfheim, but it was something, and if it held the power to hide Thor from the likes of Asgard, it was something dangerous and interesting.

Mjiolnir flew slightly lower when it approached the biggest conglomeration of lights Loki had seen so far. The magic tool went right for a gaudy tower and Loki braced himself. He shielded his eyes with one arm and gripped tighter, since the hammer was going to doubtlessly smash everything on its way.

The crashing didn’t happen as Loki had expected, though. Before he was close enough to the building, a magic shield separated Loki from the hammer’s path; the handle slipped his grip and Loki saw it crash through a window as he fell, befuddled, to the busy street under him.

He had a spell to paddle his fall, because landing in a crater was undignified and unnecessarily flashy, but that wasn’t the humiliating part. There was magic that he didn’t know! Midgard was supposed to be seidrless! It hurt his pride more than Mjolnir not moving when he tried to lift it.

There were humans around him, pointing devices at him and shooting lights, but nobody hostile so far. Loki didn’t care about them; he only cared about the accursed tower. Thor was usually the one to barge in, rush into a fight, but Loki was no stranger to bad decisions made in the heat of the moment.

He rushed into the tower through the front door, without answering to the questions that some people were asking. Thor now had his hammer, but Loki knew from experience that it could land him in more trouble than before he had it.

Loki climbed the stairs and avoided people left and right. Unless they had a powerful weapon, they weren’t dangerous. He only started to cool down by floor five. Fine. There was someone with seidr on Midgard. It made sense; someone powerful, probably not a human, had to be hiding Thor. It _didn’t_ make sense that Loki couldn’t feel it, but it would make sense later, probably. By floor seven, it was clear that Loki had gotten himself into a trap.

He stopped and looked at the sign that had the fourth floor bolded with the words “Offices 230-360”. The same sign had been there for the last three floors. Loki looked down the hole in the middle and he climbed a couple of floors more. The distance to the first floor grew, but the sign was the same.

Humans were going up and down, not minding Loki. They had no problem navigating the stair, so it had to be a perception spell, directed at him, triggered by the intrusion. Loki pinched the bridge of his nose. Knowing the spell, but being unable to feel its construction was bound to give him a headache. The thing was: if Loki couldn’t feel the spell, he couldn’t modify it either.

“Can I help you?” Loki left his nose-pinching to focus on the unassuming human in front of him.

Loki couldn’t read much of him. He was just a human wearing what probably were human clothes, with a smile that maybe was considered polite by humans or maybe not: Loki had mostly ignored Midgard like he was told to do. The man was shorter than Loki, he looked older and he was balding; that was all he knew.

“Otherwise, I should show you to the door.” The man made a wave downstairs with a hand. With his other hand the man gestured as if he would gently push Loki down if he didn’t move on his own. Loki wasn’t impressed with the human mannerisms.

“Someone in this tower has imprisoned my brother and I won’t be deterred by illusions or humans, Thor will go back unharmed to his family and his duties or war will rain on this realm.”

The short man frowned, but he didn’t look angry. “In that case…”

The short man made a move to reach for something inside his jacket. It could be anything, it could be a weapon, maybe this little man was the one responsible for the silent magic. There was a chance he could even be able to fight Loki; appearances could be deceiving.

So in the split second while Loki thought the possibilities and the man reached for something, Loki came to a decision: he threw the man through the stairwell.

Loki ran inside the fourth floor without waiting to hear the sound of the body hit the ground. He found an open door to a very small room and he rushed in with more people. The dwarves had similar contraptions in their mines, elevators, so he knew the thing had to travel up at some point.

The people inside the elevator looked at him with curiosity, but not fear or bafflement. The music did nothing to help the situation where everyone tried not to look too intently. The door opened twice to let people in and out, but the room was still going up, far away from the fourth floor, so he stayed in, waiting in awkward silence.

The third time the door opened, a young woman who seemed to be eating something repeatedly (something that made Loki try to remember if humans were one of the regurgitating species or not) came in and looked him up and down and up again. She didn’t move until Loki stared back and lifted an eyebrow.

“You are a new Avenger or what?”

Loki lifted the other eyebrow.

“You fit the ‘out of a Menshealth cover’ standard. That and the clothes.”

Loki only looked forward to the steel door, but the woman didn’t stop.

“They are not, like, super-secret with the stunts they pull, so you can tell me. I’m Darcy, by the way, and you are…” Loki looked stubbornly ahead. “…not telling me. Okay, but if you are not a new Avenger I’m going to assume you are a super villain trying to get in.”

Loki stopped himself from rolling his eyes; if there was a villain, it was the one who had taken his brother, not him. The door to the floor Darcy had chosen opened and closed, but the woman only reached to push the highest number. Loki could certainly stab her and keep going up, but she wasn’t actively trying to hurt him.

“You know this elevator only goes to the thirtieth floor, right? No? What about telling me who you are, what is your phone number and I tell you how to go all the way up?”

Loki looked at the numbers. He hadn’t considered that the room could stop before it reached the end. The door opened in the thirtieth floor and everybody came down. The door to the stairway wasn’t in the same place as the other floor and the busy hall was labyrinthine. If there was another moving room, it wasn’t obvious.

The young woman was still there, grinning up at him.

Loki had already wasted enough time, he needed to find his brother; he couldn’t waste more time looking for a way up. With the kind of magic protections set around the building; capable of blinding even Hlidskjalf, he didn’t dare imagine the kind of tortures that his brother could be suffering at that very moment at their hands.

“I came looking for someone.”

“Way to be cryptic, dude. Tell me more: who, why, where, the whole lot.”

“Someone has taken my brother, from a human city called Puente Antiguo. Whoever took him is making finding him very difficult.”

“Puente Antiguo! I have a friend there! Selvig sends us reports frequently from that middle of nowhere town. Thank god Jane got dragged here before we got stuck there too, but if the Avengers can’t help you, maybe my friend sees something. Sooo, a number? To call you if my friend finds something, of course.”

Loki was somewhat confused. His ruse had worked and she had made her own assumptions, but he was realizing humans were more complex than he remembered. Number?

“Okay, man, no need to make up a lie. I’m a grown up girl, I can take rejection like a fucking queen, just let me call Potts and we’ll set a superhero meeting just for you.” She walked ahead and Loki followed. “Yes, Pep? I have a weird, lost-looking guy here.” She turned right. “No! Not security! He looks like the kind of weird friends Tony and company attract on a regular basis.” She turned left twice. “We are on floor thirtieth. Would you do us a favor and beam him up with the private elevator?” She stopped in front of a steel door that looked more golden than gray and the door opened. “You are a star, Pep. See you!”

The young woman pushed him in and waved goodbye as the doors closed too quickly for Loki to react or protest. There weren’t number buttons inside either, just mirrors. It looked like a cell that was going up. He wasn’t going to complain about that, but it wasn’t going fast enough, and Loki had time to draw all kinds of grotesque pictures of what could be happening to his brother in their hands.

His paranoia made him summon some knives before feeling his magic starting to be dampened. He still couldn’t feel _what_ was doing the dampening and such powerful magic only spurred his imagination to go to the direst possible situations and wondering if he was already too late.

Therefore, when the door opened and he sled in carefully, he expected to find chains, enemies, slaves, jailors, torture chambers, fowl instruments of torment, cuffs, bars and cages, blood, screams, and pain. He had expected locked doors at the very least.

He found a feast instead.

There were seven people in the room, including his brother, who was free. Despite that, Loki had his knives out, prepared to fight. Maybe it was all an illusion, maybe the nightmare would appear as soon as he lowered his guard, but Thor seemed to be there, making merry with those human creatures.

“And what do we have here?” Some of the humans had noticed Loki holding knives where they held glasses.

Loki didn’t answer, but he walked in, never leaving an open spot. This was no illusion, Loki would have already found a mistake in an image as familiar as Thor, so there had to be more to it. In addition, these people weren’t feeling threatened by the armed stranger, Loki saw the signals, but he couldn’t see the trap.

“Loki! Come!” Thor cheered.

“Did Coulson let him pass?” said one human in a lower voice.

“Must have,” answered another.

“But we already have the new one, so this…” half-asked a third one.

“A test?” suggested the human by the big windows; one of which was broken.

“Darcy called, she said…” another one commented before Thor’s voice drowned her.

“LOKI! These are the Avengers; heroes of Midgard.” He introduced them as a bulk, dangling his hammer around with a smile and ignoring the doubts that Loki was causing in his captors.

“Thor, come with me, we must talk.” Loki inched closer very slowly and not lowering his guard at all.

“There is nothing I can’t share with these people, Loki, speak now. I’m an Avenger now!” Thor walked closer to Loki, but nowhere near enough to be considered safe if these humans decided to attack. Therefore, Loki didn’t relax. Clearly, Thor had been brainwashed, but that wasn’t a terribly difficult feat, so Loki wasn’t impressed. They probably hadn’t even needed magic to do it.

“I don’t think these people have been sincere with you, Thor. I don’t think they are even human.”

“Well, yes, we are only kinda, somewhat, somedays, part-time, still human, depending on how you define human.” The one sprawled on the sofa opened his arms in an inviting gesture. “But we did tell him.”

Loki ignored the foe.

“Thor, they abducted you and hid you from Heimdall, mother, and the All-seeing throne,” Loki explained slowly and in a low voice that the other creatures would probably hear anyway.

“Because I won’t go back, Loki!” Thor exclaimed, making all pretense of privacy fruitless. “Father banished me, left me alone and powerless, these people offered me something better.”

“Odinson? Introductions are in order I think?” One of them, a woman, said.

“Yes, Thor. Let us meet the scared cat,” said one who was also sitting, but not sprawled, on the sofa.

“Clint, you are not helping.”

“Friends, this is my former brother, Loki.” _Former?_ What was that oaf saying now? “Loki, these are…” Thor trailed off, looking clueless at the faces of those maybe-humans.

“You have already forgotten, haven’t you?” mocked one of the females.

“Yeah, the last Pride did it all the time.”

Loki wasn’t there to make friends with Thor’s abductors. He had to admit that being called Thor’s _former_ brother hurt because of his own recent discovery, but it had to be a misunderstanding; Thor didn’t know the truth.

“Thor, we need to get out of here. Mother will undo your punishment as soon as you put a foot on Asgard soil.”

“No, Loki, I will stay here. They haven’t questioned my judgment like father did.”

Loki debated telling Thor that Odin was dead. He was in the Odinsleep, after all, dead wasn’t so far a state and it would shake Thor from his inopportune childish tantrum. Thor would fight his captors to run home and console mother; by then Loki would have another trick to make Thor stay in Asgard.

He didn’t have time to put his plan into action, though. Thor looked fixedly at Loki, with questioning eyes that Loki had never seen in his brother. Then there was a shift that even Loki could feel, like a brush of foreign magic, but still not like Loki’s seidr.

“Maybe it is you that should stay,” Thor said. Loki did not imagine the predatory hint in his voice; the same that he had in his eyes. It was unnatural, but Thor had never had much talent for magic, so there had to be more.

“Yes, man, tempt him!”

“It would be good practice.”

“Definitely a test.”

He looked at the chorusing fiends; they had hungry eyes too and Loki could only wonder if he had gotten himself in more danger than he could take with just his daggers. However, they were pushing Thor like there was some rite to it, a dare or a challenge, and if he didn’t pass, maybe Loki had a chance of bringing his brother home. If Thor failed, Loki could take the oaf from their claws and leave all of this without bloodshed.

He only had to guess what game they were playing.

“Loki, you don’t need to come back,” Thor started softly, as if he was talking to a scared animal. “There is nothing for you back home. You, like me, can be so much more without Odin. Come on, Loki, you have always known. You have always been so proud of yourself, of your magic, of your wits. You are always proud, think how much more you could be if you left Odin behind to stand by my side.”

“You think me prideful?” Loki said without thinking of the challenge. “I always need to remind myself that I’m worth _something,_ and you think me _prideful_?” Loki was going to continue with how leaving Odin would still leave him taking care of Thor, but then the word clicked. The human-fiends had said Pride like it meant more. Whatever this was, pride was the key.

“Pride is fragile, but it has been my best weapon! Against you! I could learn to accept who I am or let myself wither in someone else’s shadow. You can’t use it against me, because I know I am rightfully proud. I am a great mage and I have saved us uncountable times. Who is going to be proud of me if not I? Who has ever seen my worth? You won’t make me stay here by offering misguided pride that you’ve only ever felt for yourself.”

“Preach it, man!” A clapping came from the couch; from the slouched man-creature. “I always say that it isn’t arrogance if you can back it up.”

The first creature’s interruption seemed to open the gates and the others started a flood of comments as if they had seen a sparring match on the training grounds.

“Thor needs to practice.”

“Lots of practice, in my opinion.”

“He should have gone with the ‘make them proud’ approach.”

“You noticed it too?”

“Hard to miss it.”

“He missed it.”

“They were brothers, it’s not valid.”

“The boy dodged the temptation, it is not on Thor.”

“He dodged a badly thrown temptation, it is on him too.”

“He eluded _one_ temptation, what would _you_ do with him?”

“Thor said _the word_ , you never say _the word_ when tempting. Poor taste all that _pride_ here, _pride_ there.”

Loki didn’t care who was saying what, it was all nonsense, so he cut the discussion drastically. “Is Thor out of your group, since he didn’t _tempt_ me?” Loki hadn’t let go of his blades and he gripped them better, in case they’d turn against him now.

Loki waited for the inevitable burst of anger when all of them turned their looks on Loki. He was trying to take something from them, no matter that Thor was neither a something nor theirs in the first place, but Loki had seen creatures fighting for less. Thor and his captors didn’t look like they were in a fighting mood; only Loki was like a taut bow about to either kill or snap. There was a long look from ones to the others; something transpired during that look.

“What do you say, Pride?” said one of the women carefully.

“I want to stay,” Thor answered imperviously, much to Loki’s chagrin.

“You will have to work on your skills,” she warned. Thor looked peeved by the prospect.

“Daring a Pride is cheating, you always know they will…”

“Shut up, Clint,” said the sprawled man-thing. Then he sat upright and looked back at Loki. “Sorry, kitten, he said his piece, you must leave.”

“No, Thor needs…” Loki started defensively.

“Unless…”

Loki looked at the woman standing next to the man who had spoken last. The creatures were laughing at him, he was sure of it.

“Unless?” Loki gritted his teeth.

“Unless you accept to stay around for a few days,” she continued.

“Only stay? For a few days?” Loki could have smelled the trick all the way from Asgard.

The sitting man nodded. “You will get a chance to convince him to run back home to daddy each time you avoid temptation from one of us.”

There was an eerie rapport between all of them that made Loki’s hairs stand on his arms and nape.

“Six more chances,” Loki stated.

“What, you think you need more?” the sprawled man dared with a smirk.

“Why didn’t you take over Pride’s place again?” the standing man said, partly exasperated.

The sitting man’s smirk turned into a playful grin. “Because mine is more fun, Cap.”

“What happens if I lose?” Loki cut the chatter.

“If you are tempted and one of us can lay a claim on you,” one of the standing men answered, “we can order you to, I don't know, leave him, forget about getting him back. You abandon anything related to us, and never tell anyone about any of this, for example.”

“Sounds fair enough.”

“With us, _fair_ is never the word.”

“And now we are closed, please come back tomorrow.”

The sprawled man stood up, clapped once and suddenly Loki was standing in the middle of a very busy New York street. He only avoided denting one of those feeble cars by chance. Once he was on a sidewalk, he looked up. The skyscraper was too tall to be sure of who was up there, but he thought he could distinguish heads looking mockingly from above.


	3. Ups and Downs

He didn’t know what manner of creatures he was facing, but he wasn’t going to stay idle while they kept his brother, humiliated Loki, and thought themselves above him; Asgardian prince or not. He wouldn’t be ridiculed that easily.

Loki asked to the people with flashing devices, for the most reliable source of information on the planet. Initially, he had wanted to find a library, but he found the internet instead. Loki walked for a bit, nicked one phone, and then nicked a better one, more up to his standards.

Starting was easy. He found about the Avengers, the tower where they lived, and their heroic deeds. The latest news reported the leader of the Avengers leaving them alone. That Janet woman said she was tired of being dismissed in an interview. Loki knew that wasn’t all; she didn’t mention anything about Pride at all.

Looking for Pride only showed Loki more than he wanted to know about human’s problems with sexuality, which Loki could have lived without knowing, honestly. He wondered if Thor being “pride” meant that he had to change his cape for that multicolored flag and defend a pride that Asgard would rather hide. Maybe he could use that to scare Thor back to Asgard.

Searching seidr and magic confirmed that humans knew close to nothing about it. Whatever was going on was outside the norm for humans. That search was fruitless, but he found magic was considered pagan because of something called Christianity; which had been invented shortly after Odin banished Jotuns from Midgard.

Its rites were quite similar to magic concepts based on belief. He found Islamism, Buddhism, Judaism, Scientology and many other religions that were based on the same things. Loki thought all of them equally moronic; only a race that knew nothing of magic could create such feeble legends out of mediocre mages.

The battery of his device beeped when it was close to running out. Loki looked up from the screen; it was almost dawn and Loki wasn’t tired. Days were longer in Asgard, and he was used to lasting campaigns that had them walking day and night, so he didn’t mind avoiding sleep for a little longer.

The street where he found himself was mostly empty. The buildings in that part of the city weren’t as tall and people looked less rushed than the ones he had seen before with the flashing lights. The device in his hand vibrated and turned off on its own. Loki left it on the floor. No need to break it if someone else could get in trouble for finding it.

There wasn’t anyone he could pickpocket easily in that street, but he wanted more internet to keep searching. Looking around him, most buildings looked like homes, there was a green awning in front of him with the name “Zoralie”; some kind of place to eat, apparently, but it was closed. There was a red-bricked building next to it. It had white decorations and arches on the door. A black fence with golden spikes surrounded the front and it was open; Loki knew because someone had entered hitting the stairs with a cane.

White letters on a red awning said “Church of the Sacred Heart of Jesus” and Loki had read about that, right? One of those religions with prophets… Islam, maybe? All of them blurred into one big nonsense, but since he didn’t have more Internet, he could go on and try to investigate firsthand if there was some magic behind all those myths.

Also, he didn’t want to miss the chance to disrespect petty human gods if he could.

The temple was a _church_ , and it was also empty except for the man he had seen coming in. Loki didn’t know anything about this religion’s protocol, so he walked carelessly up the middle hall with the blue-vaulted ceiling; walked on and around the elevated piece with four columns in the front to look at the three sculptures. There were a man and a woman with a bleeding man hanging in the middle. Humans were disgusting, worshipping pain like that.

There wasn’t magic, though.

“You can’t stand there, sir,” said the man sitting on the bench on the back.

“I can’t?” Loki smirked. He didn’t know it was improper, but if he had known, he would have done it sooner. He only abstained from jumping on the benches because it would make him look childish.

Loki walked to the man with the dominant elegance that his mother had taught him to use. The man didn’t look at him, though; he had dark glasses, a gash on his face and angry-red knuckles. He didn’t seem offended by Loki’s antics, which brought Loki down a notch.

“I see you are not the religious kind, what brings you here?” the sightless man said.

Loki thought about it carefully.

“Pride,” he said at last, looking at the front.

“A deadly sin,” the man chuckled humorlessly. “You could say I’m here for another one. But wrath is much more destructive than pride.”

Loki looked again at the gash and the knuckles. He could easily believe the stranger, and he seemed to know something Loki wanted to learn. “You look like the man I’m looking for. Who is a sin?”

The man actually turned to him with a deep frown. “Who? What do you mean _who_? If this is a prank, you should get out of here before someone throws you out.”

Well, curse the thought of a Jotun; the man looked suspicious now. Maybe he shouldn’t have disrespected the place so openly, now he wouldn’t tell him what that thing about Pride was. Loki tried to excuse himself, saying that he was new, but apparently “sin” was such a common thing that his half-lie wasn’t believable enough and he had to leave the place before he invoked the man’s ‘wrath’.

So he went to a busier street and he nicked another phone.

He almost dropped it when the screen showed his own face under the Newspaper title “New Friend or Foe?”. In hindsight, it was logical; he had been seen falling unscratched from the tower of some famous group, at the time he had thought that humans weren’t capable of much, so he hadn’t considered the press.

He hid his face and dressed plainly and according to human fashion before someone could recognize him. Then he looked up what was a “sin” and why it was “deadly”. Apparently, there was some minor character in the Christian fables named “The Devil” and Loki wasn’t sure if he was good or bad, because he was something like the jailor of bad “souls”. Or something. It didn’t make much sense. There were sayings like “sympathy for the devil” and “the devil’s advocate” that made everything so much more complicated.

The Deadly Sins were clearer, more or less, and there were other related religions like Satanism that could be useful, in a way. Loki spent the morning learning demonology and other obtuse writings on botched attempts at magic. He felt like he was in the right way. There were seven creatures —not quite humans, maybe demons— in that tower, if he counted his brother. It could be nothing, or it could be a signal. He was out of ideas otherwise, so he was going to go with the signal.

He headed back to the tower with more knowledge, but not many defenses against whatever magic they were using. Furthermore, by now they had to be aware of the man he had thrown through the stairwell, and they wouldn’t be too happy about that. He still came in through the front door, and this time he found the golden-steel door instead of the stairs. He knocked on it, since it didn’t have buttons, and the numbers over the door changed, so it must have been the right thing to do.

When the doors opened, though, he had to step back. There was a familiar short man who was very much not dead.

“Hello again, you didn’t let me finish yesterday, you should be wearing this.”

The man reached for his inner pocket again and the only reason Loki didn’t throw him down the stairwell again was because there wasn’t one. People weren’t supposed to be alive, hale, and terribly unconcerned after a brush with death. The little man didn’t care, he only handed Loki a plastic card and left him alone.

Loki didn’t know what to do with the card. It had a lace, and the man, if he was a man, had said that it was meant to be worn, so maybe as a pendant? Anyway, it had a black band and information on him.

_Visitor: Loki Odinson_

_Reason: Family, Challenger_

_Status: Antagonist_

_Capabilities: Superhuman, Magic_

In Asgard, only soldiers who went to war wore similar things inside their armors; it was done to identify the bodies in case they died. A shiver went down Loki’s spine with good reason. He summoned more daggers than the previous day and hid them as best as he could in the human clothing before stepping into the elevator.

As soon as the doors opened again, one of the women, willowy and with long light orange hair, crowded him. He had seen her the previous day and he had read about her in the mobile device: Virginia Potts, not an official Avenger, but an effective member of the team nonetheless.

“Let’s get over this as soon as possible, I have things to do.”

“Pep! Wait for the others.” It was the same sprawling man, who was now serving drinks and wearing more revealing clothes than the previous day. Loki hadn’t had the chance to learn much about human fashion, but it seemed to be quite similar to Asgard: More clothes, more formal; more skin, more informal. Other subtle cues were lost on him, though. The man had to be the owner of the tower; Stark.

“Do we have to make a show out of this?” Potts, said as she walked further into the room inviting Loki to walk along.

“You know me, of course we do. And Clint will want popcorn too.”

The woman huffed.

“Where is Thor?” Loki asked; the first words he uttered since he came in.

The other humans and his brother came in saying their greetings barely a second after his question, so there was no need to answer.

“Loki! You come to stay?”

“Thor, you should wait,” said a man almost as well built as his brother. Steven Rogers, or Captain America, as the newspaper called him. “It’s the rules: he has to earn his chance to convince you.”

Thor nodded solemnly, as if he was perfectly happy obeying their rules and sat with the other humans.

“Oh! So Coulson finally found you.” One of those demons, one who looked deceptively gentle, Doctor Banner, pointed at the plastic card. Loki still wasn’t sure of how to act around any of them, so he looked at Potts to start with whatever she was going to try.

She got his meaning quickly and she didn’t make him wait any longer. The woman looked at Loki closely, evidently measuring him, and she crossed her arms.

“You should go back.” Loki was only a bit startled by how sharply she spoke. “You have a throne waiting for you at home; if Thor stays you will be unchallenged, everything could be yours and only yours; everything and everyone… or you could stay here.” Loki frowned, not understanding what she was offering. “I have one of the biggest companies in the United States and I’ve been told you have some diplomatic skills. If you stay here, it wouldn’t be too difficult to own this planet, it would only take you a human lifespan, a blink for you, then you could come back covered in glory and have Asgard too.”

Loki felt curious about what that would entail, but he was also appalled by the thought of staying in Midgard. Potts wasn’t done, though. “I feel more in the way of ruling, it is something I don’t fully know, but you _do_ know that you are owed something else, something that could make you the most powerful being anywhere.”

Loki recoiled at that. She meant the Jotun throne, of course, the idea had crossed his mind, but it held no appeal. Ruling the Jotuns could be productive, but opprobrious. In fact, none of the thrones she offered had any appeal at all. He had grown to understand that Thor was going to be king, and even though glory and respect had some appeal, he knew none of it was worth losing Thor forever.

“Greed,” he muttered under his breath.

“The alien did his homework!” said the dirty-blond male who was sitting with the legs extended in front of him, Hawkeye; the press didn’t have his real name. Potts sent him a glare and looked back at Loki.

“Everything could be yours; you only have to reach for it.”

“And yet I won’t do it.” Loki was taking air to make a longer speech, but Potts turned to the others more naturally than during her speech. Loki felt the air lose tension and realized that there had been more of that strange magic at play.

“See? He isn’t tempted, can I leave now?”

“You didn’t even try. He is ambitious, you could have done it,” the gentle-looking demon said.

“Yes, Pep, I’ve seen you convince world-leaders that they need clean energy with such selfish reasons that the green side was completely ignored, why not use all your cards?” needled the Thor-like Captain demon.

“He is clearly not mainly mine.” She crossed her arms. “I have more productive fishes to catch with less cost to my resources, thank you. Only everything would satisfy him, his brother included, but I won’t give him everything, and he likes too much the prospect of earning it himself.”

She took some papers from a small table and left with a fast strut, not stopping to say goodbye.

“Awwww, she didn’t want to play, then… she was indulging us?”

“You didn’t know?”

The two men looked like they were about to start bickering, so Loki interrupted before they could start.

“Can I speak with my brother now?”

One of them, Stark, made a dismissive gesture. Thor stood up and walked with Loki outside, to a circular platform from where most of the city could be seen, along with a massive park in front of them. It was obvious that Thor was dragging his feet.

“Brother, this world is too small for you,” Loki started, appealing to logic. “You will grow tired of humans. They can’t fight you; you are far stronger than any of them. So what do you care if they look up to you? They don’t see the worth of your deeds; only something you were born with.”

Thor didn’t wait even a heartbeat to answer. “It is of no consequence, Loki. I’m still a God for them, no matter what I do. Odin always wants more from me: a warrior, a prince, an heir… You don’t understand, Loki, you have never understood. He never wanted you to be anything. You have had it so much easier…”

Thor looked at the horizon with melancholy while Loki wanted to gape and smack him simultaneously. He could admit that Thor had some pressure, but Thor never did what Odin wanted, he never acted as an heir or a prince! Only as a warrior, because that was what he wanted to do! And he was never punished! Why did that spoiled brat complain?

Loki counted to ten and reminded himself that he loved his brother for some reason, and that he couldn’t just abandon him in Midgard because they saw things differently.

But it was hard.

“Thor, you could go back, explain to father how you feel. You could come to an understanding.”

“No. If I’m not the king of Asgard, who would be? Odin only has me, and he won’t let me go if I come back.”

That… that conceited little Aesir… _Odin only has me?!_ So what was Loki, a limp horse in the stables? _Calm._ He needed to calm down, or he would lose Thor forever.

“I will help you, we will convince father—”

“No more, Loki. I will hear no more. I’m happy here and I don’t need to talk to father if I don’t go back.”

Thor didn’t let Loki use the rest of his arguments; he walked back in with his most princely march, cape flying in the wind. Loki was going to follow that dramatic idiot, but the other fiends must have been listening in, because two came out and prevented Loki from chasing him.

“Wait, wait, wait, Kitten. You’ll have another chance tomorrow.”

Loki could fight those two easily, but he didn’t want to break the fragile peace between them when he still had a chance to win Thor back. He simply stood back before the demons could touch him and watched Thor leave the inner room. Loki looked closely at the two who had come to stop him. One was the sprawling man, Stark: dark-haired, brown-eyed, short beard, something behind his clothes was bright and blue, maybe magic, and he seemed to have a permanent grin sewn to his lips.

Loki didn’t need the news to know the other man was an archer. Loki had seen enough archers in his life to recognize the sore on the forearm from a hasty shot and the calloused fingers from tensing the bow. That blond man had been irreverent through all their interactions so far; trying to cover the fact that he was unsettled with a nonchalant demeanor.

“I don’t know human customs, but I don’t think keeping guests exposed in the open can be considered polite.”

“You are not a guest,” bit the Hawke.

“I thought you might have questions,” said Stark at the same time.

“And you would answer them? Sincerely?” Loki narrowed his eyes and Stark widened his grin.

“Probably not, it would depend on how you answer mine.”

The man’s stance became something sharp and sarcastic, but inviting. Loki knew for a fact that such an attitude was far more dangerous than a poisoned dagger in each hand, and he knew it because he had used it countless times in court, to lure and enchant where he couldn’t use Thor’s direct tactics.

“Questions,” Loki stated, since the man seemed to like talking without much prompting.

“Yes, like why my machines went haywire as soon as you and your hammer crashed my party. Or where actually is Asgard, because if I hear it is on a cosmic tree one more time...” The human rolled his eyes.

“We could strike a deal; an answer for an answer,” Loki proposed.

Stark smirked like a predator who had smelt blood. “A deal upon a deal? You’d risk so much for questions I might not answer?”

Loki took a moment to think why such a seemingly childlike deal could elate Stark so. The growing curiosity was a mistake on Loki’s part, it distracted him. While he was assessing the tantalizing threat before him, deep in a staring contest with Stark, the archer got closer. Too close.

“You two can speak when it’s his turn, I only came because Coulson would never do it and you deserve it, asshole.”

The Hawk then proceeded to push Loki off the edge of the platform with a strong lateral kick that would have been easy to stop if Loki hadn’t been paying attention to the other creature at the moment. As things were, wind tangled his hair and deafened his ears. Anger took over for a moment; he had lowered his guard with such an _obvious_ trick...

Anger turned hot and cold in his stomach, morphing into fear when he realized his seidr wasn’t answering his call. Only then did he realize how tall the tower really was and how fast the floor was rushing to meet him. He didn’t have a way to cushion his fall. He would survive, probably, but how linked to his seidr was his restorative capability? It was too late to learn now; it was either death or agonizing pain anyway.

Loki panicked for almost ten endless seconds while his mind hurried to find other solutions, each more absurd than the previous one. Then he passed the limit of the magic shield and instinct teleported him to the safest possible place. He couldn’t simply get rid of the acceleration, though; teleporting to the ground would only squash him faster, so the spell took him to a lake, the park he had seen from above.

The water was dirty and Loki had to spit filth when he reached shore. He laid looking at the pink-orange clouds. Loki was glad of having changed into human clothes before. His Asgardian garb would have dragged him to the bottom of the lake and that would have been just the perfect final humiliation.

Paranoia made him feel eyes on him. The tower was too far, nobody was watching him, but his blood didn’t understand about logic, and his pulse played a fast piece for a few minutes before it decided that there was, in fact, no danger.

People walked by Loki’s side; Loki had the precaution of hiding behind a discretion spell, so there weren’t flashes or questions. The day had been bad enough without adding public to the mix, and it wasn’t over. There had to be information about those _sins_ somewhere. Loki would find a way, even if he had to avoid sleep, as always.


	4. Relativity of Guilt

The next day Loki arrived at the base of the tower intending to keep his distance with the archer and Stark, but he never made it inside. There was a hefty blond who thought himself very inconspicuous with sunglasses, a cap, and a piece of cloth Loki had seen referred as a hoodie. Loki approached the poor delusional fool and dropped his own (much more effective) disguise to see him jump.

The demon-man, Captain America, explained that he had been waiting to have a chat away from his mates at the tower. Loki contained an eye roll, because, really, what _else_ could he be doing waiting, so very badly hidden, at the door of his own home?

The demon didn’t want to talk there, though, and he wanted to be called Steve, or at least Rogers. He was under the impression that all the walls, plants and pockets in the vicinity had ears, and he wanted some discretion for _this,_ whatever _this_ was. After the previous day, Loki was wary of any possible trick, so at first he didn’t want to follow the demon. Furthermore, maybe tempting Loki away was the Sin’s plan; Loki wasn’t sure of what were the rules of the absurd game he was playing.

“Why would you want to hide anything from your companions?” Loki didn’t expect an honest answer, but the kind of lie could also show what kind of weakness the demon was going to try to exploit.

“Because… I’ve never understood why. Honestly, I’m just as confused as you. I wish I had the control Bruce has over it, but I… well, some days I feel like I’m just trying to advance in the dark and I only manage to stumble with everything in the way.”

Loki looked at him, unimpressed with the blatant attempt at gaining his trust; trying to build a bond in parallel generic experiences. Seriously, those demons were supposed to be good with lies and enticement. This one was completely underwhelming, Loki didn’t lower his guard yet, in case it was a new trick.

“Look, I only want to explain,” Rogers said firmly, somewhat defensive.

“Will you explain me their weaknesses?” Loki countered with his most obnoxious smile.

Rogers blinked, but regained his composure quickly. “I can’t do that.”

“Then you are of no help, and I’m not interested in your explanations. Now, if you excuse me…” Loki sidestepped the mass of muscles.

“Wait, before you go in, you should know we were talking about you-” Oh joy, gossip. Warriors and heroes, in Loki’s experience, were the kind of gossipers who distorted a paper cut into a deadly wound. “- and we realized you have been avoiding sleep and skipping meals.”

“And how would you know that?” Loki was going to come in, but he got suddenly curious and walked back. Maybe there was that feel-less magic that eluded his perception.

“You made a big entrance,” Rogers blushed, but didn’t let it be noticed behind his collected façade. Loki was starting to get a feel on the demon. There was something he considered ‘bad’ for some reason; Loki could use that apparent guilt, if it was real, to get information. “The press has been keeping an eye on you, and us through it. We have on record most of what you did yesterday until you left.”

Loki looked suspiciously around him. The press was still sniffing around and they had already been taking pictures without Loki realizing. Loki donned his disguise again as discretely as possible and pushed Rogers to that place he wanted to go to. If he was going to interrogate that stray puppy, he should take advantage of the offer of a more secluded location.

The place in question turned out to be some kind of inn where food and drinks were served. Rogers ordered two _lattes_ (Loki wouldn’t drink a drop. Nothing assured him it wasn’t poison) and put a bag on the table. From the bag he took some kind of food that smelled sweet. The unevenly round shapes were brown, bite-sized, hand-made, and an obvious peace-offer.

“I won’t eat or sleep until Thor is safe home or until I die of exhaustion,” Loki said, both avoiding the possible-poison and deepening Roger’s feeling of guilt. By the frown on his face, Loki had somehow gone as far as to twist the knife in the wound and Loki didn’t know why.

“I wish people wouldn’t treat themselves like that. It is one of the few consistent things that I have found through time. We are our worst enemies,” Steve picked one of the round shapes. “Nobody pushes and mistreats us as much as ourselves.”

“I disagree.” Loki didn’t exactly disagree, but that man had an aura or righteousness that Loki couldn’t stand. Antagonizing Rogers would become a hobby if Loki stayed on Midgard for any period of time; he seemed to be too sincere for his own good. “We can be our worst enemies, but there are many others bent on making other lives miserable pushing and mistreating. Forgetting about them to fight oneself could be the worst mistake possible.”

Loki took some pity on the man-like creature. He was being tight lipped, and if Loki was guessing right, Rogers was respecting Loki’s wish to ignore the explanations he wanted to give. Norns, was that creature real? Maybe Loki should actually leave Thor in his company for some time. Maybe something rubbed off.

“Say what you came to say.” Loki made a concession gesture. Rogers seemed to have lost his words like dropped loose change.

It could still be a trap. Lure Loki away where his brother wouldn’t see the sins killing him, but that blond oaf was… he had to be some kind of trap. Loki had seen children who still sulked from their mother’s breasts with worse intentions than the man before him. If the man was a trap, it was a trap laid by someone else; which would make a lot of sense.

Before Rogers could find the words, the waiter put the two drinks on the table, and since putting his thoughts into words was taking Rogers longer than Loki liked, Loki gave him a start. “You are gluttony, aren’t you?”

The big but young creature seemed even more uncomfortable.

“I… I don’t think so.” He played with the drink in front of him. “I’m just, me. We… The others and I… I don’t understand why they accept to be considered sins; there is nothing evil in what we do.” Rogers was getting angry in what sounded like a well repeated argument. Loki couldn’t know if the repetition was for himself or a very trite internal fight. “Teenagers starve themselves to death and people are shamed for their weight, all while people have to go to social kitchens just to survive. Teaching people to eat well and not feel guilty about it shouldn’t be called gluttony!” By then Rogers was definitely talking to some judgmental imaginary entity that wasn’t Loki.

“You are telling me you are not evil,” Loki deadpanned.

“We are not!” Rogers said, coming back to Midgard.

“Kidnapping is not evil?” Loki raised an eyebrow.

“He agreed to come,” Rogers answered defensively.

“Tricking him, then.” Loki glared, because he was starting to understand. Those ‘Sins’ were just humans at their core, and this one in particular was very concerned with being ‘good’. Loki actually approved of tricks, because bending the rules was what he did, but making that human feel guilt was more important than his personal opinion.

“There were no tricks involved! His… mindset fitted the pattern in our group. Coulson sent us to retrieve him as soon as his hmmm… cynosure huh… structure alerted him, and Natasha offered him the chance to become an Avenger, that’s all.”

“He was weak and unstable. You took advantage of him.” Loki crossed his arms. “He was alone, in a strange place, without the support of his family or friends, abandoned, exiled and freshly transformed into a creature as weak as an infant. Of course he soaked up any sign of affection or protection. Do you not see what you have done to him?”

Loki knew his brother, he knew him very well. He wouldn’t cower and hide behind some humans. Not even if he was weak as a newborn. He was prideful, reckless, and thought that everyone loved him. But Rogers didn’t know that, and by the look in his eyes, Loki had managed to make him question their actions.

“He wasn’t frightened-”

“My brother is very good mimicking confidence.” More lies. Thor hadn’t faked his confidence like Loki ever. Still, Rogers was so young… so full of doubt… it was easy to shape his thoughts. “I won’t let you keep him.” Loki used the tone Thor used when he embarked any ‘worthy’ quest; if Rogers liked tragic heroes, Loki would give him one.

“We have started with the wrong foot, but our intentions-”

“Of course, I’ve read a bit of Midgardian lore: intentions pave the way to hell, right? Where you hail from?” Loki expertly played an accusing but oblivious look.

That seemed to shock the sadly honest man, even though it was just a play of words. Loki knew that words were far more powerful than logic and a twist of words could be much more shocking than a hard truth or a smooth lie. A well rhymed word would chase a conscience for weeks like a spell.

“We might have overlooked a few details, but-”

“Details?! You carelessly ignored his precarious position to gain his approval! You pushed him to accept you! you forgot that he was an innocent mind and you used him!” Thor would argue that spiel, with founded reasons even, but Loki would use everything against those ‘sins’. “Will you be the one to come back with me to tell his inconsolable mother that a bunch of humans convinced her child to stay away from his family forever?”

Yes, Loki wasn’t above that either. He would cry if he knew how, but Loki’s tears had always been either real or obviously fake, so he didn’t bother. Using Frigga, on the other hand, was very easy. Their mother was far more concerned about Odin than about Thor, but the lie ringed true in Rogers’ ears. He failed to defend his team of heroes and he asked in a subdued tone.

“He told us his family had abandoned him.” Perfect; he was avoiding Loki’s eyes.

“His father exiled him and here I am. Do I look like I have any intention of abandoning him? His mother sent him that hammer as soon as she learned about his predicament, does that look like abandonment to you? But you were eager to believe that the lost child wanted to go home with you, so _eager_ ,” Loki said in a venomous tone.

They both fell silent after that. Rogers could only look from his drink to the window and back to his drink. Remorse was eating him alive and Loki could barely hide his smirk. Who had let that man without real malice into a group of demons? He was barely a sprout as a person, he couldn’t be sin embodied. Who, and why, had put Rogers in that situation?

“I’ll talk with the others. I hadn’t considered how ill suited Thor was for us.” Rogers stood up, conversation apparently over for him, and squeezed Loki’s shoulder before leaving. “You’ll get back your brother.”

Loki still held the grin inside. He _almost_ felt sorry for the big man with a heart too big. This was not what Rogers had probably envisioned when he decided to stand outside the building and out of his friends’ protection.

Loki lifted the drink to his lips while he watched a crestfallen Rogers walking away from the place. A hand pushed the lid of his drink before it touched his lips. Loki frowned and looked up the arm to find a familiar, short, red-haired woman looking at him judgmentally. He was surprised, he hadn’t seen her following them, but he hid that fact behind a blank mask.

Loki scrutinized her face looking for clues. She looked at the drink she was still holding back from him and Loki left it back on the table as quick as if it had been scalding hot. Something broke and Loki felt the absence of that elusive magic.

“And to think that I actually thought you’d be able to resist for a moment.” She took the drink from him. Was that a small smirk? “Steve doesn’t even realize he is doing it.”

“What are you doing here?”

What Loki really wanted to ask was why she had just helped him, and if she had come to kill him as he had suspected from Rogers, but he couldn’t do that without giving away how lost he really was. She was the one the press knew less about, and it didn’t help that most of the questions that the press asked her were related to her figure and what she ate. Reading those questions, Loki had thought that _she_ was gluttony. Now he was at a loss.

“Bringing you your part of the deal.”

“My part? I was only having a friendly chat with your captain.”

She looked as if she was all too used to that kind of talk and she walked to the door to call someone in. Loki noticed that she was wearing a cap and a big hoodie as the good captain, but it actually worked on her. It made her look small and inconspicuous where it made the captain stand out like a saddled dragon in the wild.

Thor came in with a resigned face and they walked to Loki. The woman put her elbows on the table without sitting, looking directly into Loki’s eyes.

“We will tell Steve that he doesn’t need to do anything else and you will pretend that this never happened.”

“So you can make him feel accomplished and good about himself, without actually changing anything. I see.” Just as Loki thought, the other sins were much more shrewd than Gluttony.

“That’s the gist of it, glad we have an understanding, bye, have fun.” Then she turned to Thor, who was sitting very straight right across from Loki. “You know the way back to the Tower. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

She put her hands in the middle pocket of her hoodie and she walked out. Thor followed her with his eyes and Loki wondered if Thor wanted her company, her support, or her protection. In any case, she held his attention until the door swung shut behind her, then Thor centered a look of disgust on Loki.

“Thor…”

“No.”

“Well, that was certainly a good start,” Loki mused. “Hi, Thor, how is your imprisonment going? All nice and humane I hope.”

Thor blinked twice slowly. “It is indeed nice and humane, Loki. Why do you ask? Are you planning to stay? You should. This Realm is big and strange, even someone like you would find someone here.”

Loki bit his tongue when he was about to ask “and what is that supposed to mean?” because he knew exactly what he meant and how much his brother disliked Loki’s reclusive behavior, especially regarding his love life. Thor thought it was unhealthy and wasn’t ashamed of prodding constantly and publicly. Instead of rising to the unintentional bait, Loki focused on getting his insufferable brother back.

“And why limit yourself to one Realm when you have eight more to discover?” The smile tasted fake on his lips, so he worked on making it warmer. “But there is something you are ignoring.”

“I thought of everything! I missed nothing, Loki! You wish to see a mistake in everything I do, but I know what I’m doing.”

“A human lives for less than a century.”

Thor opened his eyes comically, but he instantly narrowed his eyes.

“That can’t be true. Even the dwarves live at least five centuries.”

Loki asked several humans in the room if they knew the lifespan of a human. Loki eyed suspiciously the man who was sitting with his back to them with a vague sense of knowing that back. Despite the weird looks he got for his troubles, a woman confirmed the data. Thor was obviously surprised.

“Well, I’ve gotten over the deaths of other friends,” he said dubiously. “Do you think me incapable of it?” Defensive again. Loki wanted to sigh his frustrations to the wind and be done with the foolish quest to retrieve Thor.

“You are capable of many things, Thor,” _capable of killing me with annoyance, even._ He didn’t say. “But can you imagine that woman, the Widow, dying? Bleeding out? Perishing from what would be a flesh wound for you?”

“I won’t let that happen!” Thor roared as if Loki was holding a knife against her throat.

“It will happen, with or without you. Time will consume her and tear her apart. Will you stand watching them wither and die as you stay young and see how their children and grandchildren head to their graves at the same speed?”

“I will find others, Loki. You are trying to confuse me! I’m a warrior; I’m not a stranger to death!”

“EVERYONE WILL DIE!” Loki lost his temper unbecomingly. “It won’t be one or two friends! It will be all of them! And since you want to bind yourself to this place, you won’t find a single soul to keep you company for more than a blink. No chance of leaving Midgard to see someone familiar. Everything will change around you. Not only people; customs, whole empires can rise and fall in your life and they won’t wait for you to adapt. Humanity will live on without you, Thor. You’ll be abandoned in this barren land.”

After his tirade, all the clients but one were staring at Loki. Loki eyed the motionless man from the corner of his eye, but Thor was frowning and not in the least convinced. He stood up and loomed over Loki, who didn’t bulge, but still had to look up.

“Fine then!” he said only slightly louder than his usual tone. “You are the one without a heart who only loves change and chaos; why don’t you stay here? Take this away from me too!” Thor looked directly at Loki: so far there had only been annoyance, now there was hatred. “I see what you are trying to do. You are jealous; you can’t let me have something just for me, not even once!”

“What are you talking about, you fool?”

“Everything has been Odin’s legacy. You had your studies, but I only had what Odin let me have. Everything of mine, I had to share with you, even my friends!”

“Share? Father made me go to your hunting trips, and you had everything you wanted. You had everything! It is not my fault if you lacked the will to pursue ambitions outside of what father already wanted you to be.”

“There was nothing else that interested me!”

“Then what are you complaining about, you big oaf!? You had what you wanted and Odin offered it to you in a silver platter!”

“I wanted to find it on my own, but you wouldn’t understand it, because you have never lacked anything like that.”

Thor walked to the door and Loki realized he was about to waste another chance.

“WAIT! THOR! Asgard will be yours, not Odin’s or mine, everything yours!”

“I don’t care! I have this, and I have it now!”

With that and the slam of the door, Loki had lost his chance. He wanted to pull his hair, shout, and above everything, he wanted to give up, but he conformed to pressing the heel of his palms against his eyes.


	5. Never a Deal

Loki had been herding his brother and his friends for millennia, but now he was incapable of holding back his remarks. Maybe Loki was losing his touch, or maybe that one big new secret was hindering him, but it meant that he was going to lose Thor, and maybe his soul in the process.

“Wow, awkward,” said a man who immediately sat on the place Thor had just vacated.

Loki knew the voice and he now knew who had been the familiar customer. There was the noise of a glass with ice that was pushed in Loki’s direction. Loki glared at the amber liquid that had simply appeared before them.

“Cheap tricks again? I’m not going to fall for that.” Loki transferred the glare to Stark.

“No,” he made a vague wave gesture. “Steve has had his chance. I will have mine another day, I only want a chance to talk.”

Loki didn’t give him the pleasure of an answer.

“Hey, Dopey, you think you can undo all that ‘not my problem’ disguise crap? It’s distracting. I can’t concentrate on your face.” Loki did take the disguise away. Not because Stark asked it, but because it was uncomfortable. “Oh, hello! That’s distracting too. Nevermind, we were about to make a deal when Clint interrupted.”

“You mean you were distracting me so your sin-brother could catch me unawares,” Loki spat.

“See? That’s exactly why I came here today,” Stark made a point of getting comfortable and using all of the space.

“To tell me that you are innocent.” Loki looked away again, as if bored. “Unoriginal. Rogers already did that.”

“Rogers? That sounds terrible. I must remember to use it. But I’m not innocent, or unoriginal, I’m as far from innocent as they get. In fact, when I saw what Birdie was up to, I kept talking instead of warning you, but still, I didn’t plan it beforehand.”

“I have no reason to believe you.” Loki looked back at Stark sternly. “In fact, you are trying to baffle me: contradicting me in an unexpected way, agreeing with me when I don’t think you will, and painting yourself guilty, just to make your next statement shine as if it was true. I’m not new to lies, Stark.”

Stark had the gall to flash a smile and take a sip of his drink.

“We were reaching an agreement when Clint interrupted.”

“You are right, we _were,_ ” Loki made sure the _not anymore_ was implied, but Stark ignored it.

“And here we are now, so why don’t you forget about Clint and we play Trivial?”

Loki glared again. He was going to abrade his eyes with so many glares in such a short time. _Play trivial,_ what did that entail for humans? Pretending to have a frivolous conversation, perhaps?

“Your name?” Loki asked finally.

“Tony.”

“Your real name.” Loki crossed his arms.

“Tony! We don’t have ‘real names’ any more than your name is _prince of Asgard_ , Kitten,” it looked like the more annoyed Loki was, the more the human enjoyed the conversation.

“You understood my question and you still refuse to answer, _Stark,_ ” Loki answered, aiming for insufferable.

“You have more interesting questions, I have more interesting questions…” Stark seemed to wonder for a moment. “For example, you look adorably confused about our Stevie. Let me sort that out for you.”

Loki didn’t have any chance to answer before Stark launched himself into a detailed explanation.

“We didn’t ever need to push Steve to do his thing. He is a natural. He spends all the time he isn’t playing the hero in the kitchen. He mother-henns, cooks, and offers food to _everyone_ , aaall the time. The news are a riot every time he opens his mouth to say something about weight. Well, they riot when he opens his mouth about a lot of things, but…”

Loki listened to a story —peppered with Stark losing track— of hunger in the trenches and at home. After some sort of potion, hunger became a constant for Rogers. His metabolism demanded constant feeding and the potion repaired any damage caused by malnutrition, so the sensation prevailed, even when well fed, and he fed everyone around him to compensate.

“I hide open packets of snacks all over the tower to see how long it takes him to find it, seal it and put it on display somewhere where it is guaranteed to get eaten in a blink. It is impressive. Clint and Janet went into hunger strikes to see who would resist the Captain’s skills for longer.”

Loki had stayed silent and still for the whole tale, Stark hadn’t even noticed his lack of interest, and if he had, he had ignored it. Stark finally met his bored eyes.

“What?” he asked.

“I just passed his test; you seem to be an utter failure at eavesdropping or you would know that. All of this would have been slightly welcome if you had come earlier. Now it is only you, making excuses for your sin-mate.”

“Yet you didn’t stop me, so it must be of some interest.” Stark was trying something, Loki knew that he had something in mind; the half-demon had expressive eyes.

“I’m interested in how much it will take you to run out of spit. Also, you must be very close to your Captain to prattle about him for so long without growing tired.”

Stark only grinned again. “You are thinking of using him, but he is stronger than you credit him; if he was a weakness for us, I would have kicked your ass for that bullshit you pulled with him.”

“So you _were_ listening.”

“Hard not to listen to your voice.”

“You might…” _be the first one to say that in centuries._ Loki stopped himself in time. He was talking to a demon and an enemy, not a friend. He couldn’t tell an enemy a fault like that, he would use it, and right now Loki needed to look as confident as possible. Loki had to admit that Stark was much better than Rogers at temptations; he would be dangerous.

Stark noted the sudden silence and he went back to the topic he had interrupted because Loki looked bored.

“You know the funniest thing? Steve was a hardcore Christian before the ice, but he still is!” Loki knew that Stark was only giving him time because something had unsettled Loki; it was a double-edged move. It let Loki compose himself, but it was done to make Loki feel grateful for the respite, not out of kindness. “He decided that humans misunderstood religion, and he has jumped to a private wagon where hell is, like, another branch of heaven.”

“And you?” Loki said, trying to move the conversation somewhere more profitable.

“I don’t believe much outside of science,” Stark answered readily enough. “I either know, or I have an unproved hypothesis until I know. Uncertainties are messy.”

Stark fell silent, expecting Loki to give something in exchange for the information, but Loki wasn’t interested in a fair trade.

“Sooo, is it my turn to ask? I told you about Cap.”

“I didn’t ask to be told any of that. I’m more inclined to believe that you owe me, for enduring your constant chatter.” Loki could almost say that the following pout was amusing, but he knew better than to fall for that. “Furthermore, I don’t remember agreeing to that deal we were making when you helped to _hurl me from your tower._ ”

Stark huffed. “Had I known you were going to be so sour about it, I would have shoved Clint instead.”

“Why did you help, then? You couldn’t expect me to be happy about it.”

“Will you answer if I do?”

Loki thought about it, but knowing a bit more about Stark’s intentions might be worth the price. He shrugged.

“If your question is pertinent, I can think about it.”

“See, Kitten, wording; thinking is not answering. I’m not new to lies either. Yes or no?”

Loki didn’t like being called out on his lies or being cornered, so he was very tempted to say no. He agreed in the end, because it seemed that Loki was on a week of bad decisions.

 “Curiosity.” Then Stark smiled sweetly, plainly taunting Loki. The god, short-changed by a mere human, was about to complain when Stark continued. “Thor had been bragging about how resilient your species is and how advanced was everything in Asgard. When I saw the chance of proving a small part of it, I simply couldn’t resist.”

“ _Thor_ _tempted you_ into it?” Loki mocked the so-called-sin.

“I prefer to think that I unwisely tempted myself. I’m awesome like that.”

Loki was very close to laughing, even knowing that it was all a plot to lull him into a false sense of control, easiness, and complicity.

“What is your question?” Loki knew he wasn’t going to get anything else from his question. Stark was merely playing.

“Tell me about Thor.”

Loki schooled his face immediately, but not fast enough. He could sell the deepest secrets of Odin, but Thor… and deep down, Loki knew that he should have expected this. It was the same in every realm, so why would this human be any different? _Where is the prince? No, not you, Thor._ Which reminded Loki of how he should have known he wasn’t an Aesir prince sooner.

Stark laughed in his face and it hurt, mildly. How dared he?

“What, you want me to be interested in you instead of our new asset?” Stark changed his tone, from mocking to merely cheeky. “But, would you admit it if you were? Or maybe I _am_ interested, but I know that you won’t answer any question about yourself. You have no way of knowing with the way you closed up to us.”

Loki pondered what to tell and ignored Stark’s riddle, which could give him a nasty headache. Talking about his brother could only turn in his favor anyway.

“Then ask a question,” he said levelly and pretending that Stark’s words hadn’t affected him in the slightest. “It was the deal, and ‘tell me about Thor’ is not a question’.”

“You are worse than my lawyers.” Stark smiled like he had won something.

“I’ve had to trade in Alfheim,” Loki said vaguely.

Stark seemed to think for a long time. He played with the plastic stick that had come with Loki’s drink; first twirling it skillfully and then chewing on it. It was probably meant to be distracting, but it was just grating on Loki’s nerves. “Is your brother loyal?”

“To a fault,” Loki answered with the shortest possible answer and looked into Stark’s eyes, seeing how he liked having his petty trick played on him.

He was amused. Loki didn’t need to wonder why; it was yet another trick. Loki had just proved that he was paying attention and playing into his game. It was a way of building a fleeting trust between strangers, sharing a joke and a complicit look. Loki didn’t want to admit that it was working, he kept talking instead.

“He has been loyal to Asgard in innumerable quests even though our enemies offered endless riches if he let them go. Odin is not only his father, but the person he has looked up to, and Thor’s devotion knows no limits; that’s the reason I still have hope of getting him back, even though their relations are stranded at the moment.”

 Stark nodded mechanically, as if he wasn’t all that interested in the answer.

“Your turn.”

“I didn’t agree to anything, shall I remind you? I agreed to one question.”

“But muuum, this is fun.” Stark moved and sat right next to Loki.

“Don’t think I don’t see what you are doing.” Loki didn’t move, because that would be seen as a retreat. “Getting physically closer won’t make what you say any less dangerous, nor more private, intimate, or true.”

Stark smiled with a semblance of kindness. “It won’t, you are right. But don’t think I don’t see what you are doing: You are telegraphing my every move and everything you see as a trick because you don’t trust yourself and you are so out of your depth that you want everything that gives you a little control.” Stark did the same as in the other seat and occupied as much as his small frame allowed him to. “Keep doing it. It’s cute and lets me know what you think about me.”

Loki very nearly fumed. “What would you ask if I gave you a second question?”

“I don’t know, something about that seidr Thor keeps mentioning probably, it seems to be what is clashing with my own studies, or maybe about that Bifrost. Wait, is it some sort of secret? Because I don’t want to waste a question.”

Loki deliberately ignored the rambling. He could do this. He could make a question and get a good answer and he would only have to say a few things about basic magic that no human would ever have the chance of using against Asgard.

“I agree to a second question, and here is what I want you to answer: What will make Thor come back?” Loki didn’t smile, no more games.

That was the big question, wasn’t it? It was no laughing matter. The fool next to him seemed to think that too, because he even lost his smirk while he thought deeply. He was thinking too much. Loki could predict his next move; he’d say that he wasn’t allowed to tell, or some other trick and he’d say that Loki had thrown away his chance.

Stark painted a smirk back on his face, there it went: “Aren’t you the loving brother?”

Loki frowned in confusion; that was not the answer he was expecting. In fact, that wasn’t an answer at all. “And being his brother is how I learnt to recognize that he is fixed on this idea. He won’t come unless I force his hand. So what rules does he have to keep in order to stay? How can I make him come back?”

 _“Aren’t you the loving brother?”_ The disgraceful fiend repeated, stretching his smile, like there was some complicity in the gesture. Loki didn’t have time for plays on words.

“Enough of your tricks!”

Loki was confused; he was growing more and more frustrated. As soon as he thought he understood one of those half-humans, something happened to disprove his theory. The first day the seven sins were eerily synchronized. Now he found that each were different, had different intentions and disagreed and lied to each other.

He had thought that they wanted Loki to lose, but the Widow had actively helped. He had thought that they were interested in owning his soul or branding him, or something equally trite, but Potts wasn’t all that interested. He had thought that the endgame of the demon in front of him was to gain his trust, but now it looked like he aimed to drive Loki to utter madness.

Loki looked into those vivacious, impish, brown eyes and he couldn’t start to guess what Stark’s game was. It was jarring on his self-esteem, but Thor was the prideful one; Loki knew that it wasn’t safe to play a new game when the rules were so obscure. Loki took a step back from the challenge.

“I see I don’t have any chances of getting interesting answers if you won’t even give me the name of your sin, so I’ll see myself out.”

Loki stood and turned his back on Stark; a calculated move to show that even though he was backing off, he wasn’t afraid of him. It usually infuriated his enemies, but Loki noted on a reflection that Stark seemed to be more worried and disappointed than angry. The man rose to his feet quickly.

“Wait!” Stark didn’t move to restrain Loki, but Loki waited anyway. “You are going to leave with a worse impression of me and that is, like, the opposite of what I came here to do! I can’t let that can’t happen, bad PR, Pepper will kill me, so let me give you a piece of advice; no strings attached: We will push Clint to go next, he can be easy, but be careful with him, and don’t taunt him.”

Loki could feel the void with the last words of the demon and he turned. The creature behind him had disappeared; Loki was safe for now. He still didn’t know those fiends’ real intentions, but he knew he was _prey_ in their game.

He had told Rogers that he wouldn’t sleep, but he hadn’t been honest with him, so Loki nicked a phone and looked up _luxury sleep New York_ on it.

He took several more phones on his way there, because he knew he’d run out of battery, or data, or the phone would block itself somehow, and he didn’t know how to solve any of those problems yet without frying the device (it had happened only once, but he wasn’t going to try again).

On his way to that _hotel_ , Loki found that there were numerous libraries in the city, and even though he was sure that the answer to get his brother back wouldn’t be anywhere public, he was far too tempted to let the opportunity pass. Now, _that_ was a real temptation, and not those petty offers the demos made.

It was… quite singular. Loki knew how the art of luring, enchanting, and appealing worked, he was good at it, those demons were supposed to be not only good, but masters. Loki didn’t know how claiming souls worked, if souls had a price somewhere, if it was a matter of trading favors, or if there was some kind of magic that could transform temptation, maybe some brain chemicals.

Those demons could be some kind of parasite, living in human hosts and feeding from other humans; a plague endemic to Midgard. Maybe humans had included them in their religions naturally.

But then, why were they not really trying to draw Loki in?

Those were the kind of answers that he couldn’t find anywhere, not in a library, nor on the internet and they bounced, accumulating more questions every time he thought about them. It was a headache that didn’t relent with the visit to the library. The scraps of information that he actually found there only made the aching more poignant. The food he had (not imbued with temptation) didn’t diminish the ache; only the few hours of sleep he managed seemed to help. Sleep came with nightmares of lone moors and invisible enemies, probably thanks to the headache.


	6. Too Dark Within

Loki didn’t wake up much better; one of the phones he had stolen had an alarm programmed at 5 o’clock and going back to sleep was completely impossible. He decided that he was going to make someone else miserable too.

He left the hotel, retrieved the proper owners of the rooms and headed to the tower. He didn’t care that they were enemies or demons; people reacted differently to being awakened, he could use their reactions to his advantage. Making them react unusually was only a margin benefit, even if he wouldn’t admit it; he wanted to poke the sleeping dragons.

On his walk to the tower, Loki crossed paths with someone who was carrying a beverage, a square bag and a couple of printed news. One of the papers caught his attention because it was glossy and because it had _his face printed on it_. Loki was paranoid enough to suspect that someone had alerted whatever authorities ruled on Midgard and they were distributing his picture.

He slipped the magazine from the human’s hold (and he would have given it back, but, what a pity, the human was too far already.) It wasn’t what Loki expected. It was a picture of him, alright, standing with that soft-hearted sin, Rogers. There was another picture, smaller, that depicted him sitting with Stark. The big, black letters said: _“Superheroes catfight?”_

Loki turned a few pages until he found more pictures of Stark and Rogers posing together. Things like that article were the reason Odin didn’t allow any kind of news that didn’t go through him first.

_Is the long-rumored couple going through trouble? Who, exactly, is the stranger?_

_By Christine Everheart_

_Tension keeps mounting as the stranger keeps appearing. […] We followed Captain America, who had a date with the mysterious stranger of previous days. […]There are pictures of our beloved Captain leaving the place in a hurry. […] Is it possible that the stranger broke the passionate heart of America? Is it really only work? […] Tony Stark, notorious playboy, was seen with the same stranger later that evening. […] Could that tall and mysterious figure be a reason of conflict between Mr. Stark and Mr. Rogers?_

The article followed with an extensive rumorology of why everything pointed to Stark being involved with Rogers, followed by an excessively long rant about how Stark was unable of being loyal to any partner and why Rogers was rooted to some outdated customs about sexuality.

Why were humans so obsessed with sex? In Asgard, unless one was married, a God was lucky if he found a partner once a century. Loki could go on without it for much, much longer, since he could barely stand most Aesir’s company in court, much less in his bed. Humans! Such strange creatures.

Loki wondered exactly once if this affected to his dealings with the demons and immediately discarded the notion and saved the magazine in his pocket dimension. He still donned his disguise to avoid more unnecessary pictures, just in case.

The tower seemed to never sleep, but it was far emptier than the previous times he had visited it. He didn’t need help finding the elevator, using the card the human had given him to avoid people and starting what was becoming a ritual: summoning knives, hiding them and, now for the first time, materializing cuffs of different elements around his wrists.

He had read something about salt working along with water and chants, some herbs, prayers, and cleansing rituals (he had herb bracelets and he had figured a way to make bracelets out of salt too). If he expanded his views to other sources, he had found seven Jinns that could very well be them, but the solution was still chanting. Other evils were expelled with iron or lead (which he used to make another set of bracelets), and he had known at first glance that Enochian was laughable at best.

He spelled his skin with a tingle so he would notice if the charms worked.

The tingle didn’t fade when he reached the top floor, so he hid a small smile when the doors opened. Of course, he didn’t know which of the itchy cuffs was working, and it had a small radius of action, but that was a problem for another day.

The room was empty; the room was silent, although the lights had been turned on. The hint of light that came from the crystal-wall was much more welcoming than the empty and unused room. He walked around it with light steps, unsure of how much he was allowed to roam, but unwilling to show himself in any less than perfect control of his environment.

He inspected quickly some shelves with books and trinkets. Nothing there seemed very demonic, arcane, or magic, but he might be wrong. When he turned, the Widow was there, observing him silently. He hadn’t felt her stare and it sent a shiver down his arms and to his still tingly hands.

He was going to greet her, but a conversation coming from the hall was more interesting than some tiresome pleasantries.

“Give it a try.” It was Stark’s voice.

“No! That guy is hyperactive; you know what I’d have to do to make him mine, even as a ruse?” The archer entered the room with only some kind of short pants on him and the look of someone freshly awaken. “Let me go, I hear the bed calling me. Darling, I miss you too!” The archer exaggeratedly called over his shoulder.

“You hear that, Nat? Clint gives up,” said Stark, who wasn’t as underdressed as his friend, but was covered in some kind of dark slime. The archer jumped when he noticed that the Widow was in the room too.

“No, it’s not giving up,” he said, trying to sound dignified.

“Yes, that’s quitter’s talk,” the Widow said, hiding an amused smile.

The archer looked at her curiously and then made a gesture, apparently directed at thin air, that seemed to mean ‘can you believe her?’ Then he kept ignoring Loki and walked to the kitchen. He drowned a mug of coffee faster than Thor finished tankards of ale.

“Now?” Stark asked impatiently and eying the mug enviously.

The archer lifted a finger, went through the whole ritual to make another mug and drank it just as fast as the first one. Only then did he deign to walk to where Loki was and look him in the eye. Loki had expected some mention about the hurling, mocking or otherwise, but it looked like he didn’t care at all.

“Why do you even bother with all this bullshit?”

A weak start in Loki’s opinion. “…He is my brother.”

“So what.” He shrugged. “Tell your parents to make another.”

Loki frowned. Was he being ridiculed?

“Whatever. The thing is: you could let this all pass, too much noise. Consider it: there won’t be any difference, and you can get _something_ out of doing _nothing,_ how awesome is that! Just let me call one of the others and accept their offers.” The archer sat up, but Loki didn’t let him stand.

“I’m not interested.” Loki noticed more people joining the spectacle, but he didn’t mind them. “I’m guessing you are Sloth, but your offer is not tempting in the least.”

“Awww. C’mon, take a seat and listen, just stop this circus; it is easier.”

Loki stayed standing. “I’ve never been compelled to do things the easy way.”

“That’s what I was trying to tell Tony, tell him that for me, okay?”

Loki felt the unknown magic break again when the archer turned to include Stark in the joke. Stark was making coffee, though; he wasn’t paying attention to the drama. Loki didn’t like the tone in which the archer was implying that he was somehow broken. He had had enough with the discovery of his Jotun heritage; he didn’t need to be reminded that he was broken by some Midgardian.

“You are not being even remotely convincing,” Loki said with an aggravated tone.

“I’m not trying very hard,” Loki remembered Stark’s tip about not taunting Clint, it was… enticing, the knowledge that there was some kind of danger behind the sour-faced man, and Loki couldn’t believe it, he had to see that for himself.

“I’m sure that’s what you always say to get out of really trying,” Loki pushed as he looked briefly over Hawkeye’s head and into Stark’s eyes, who was making cutting gestures with his hands.

“You are more stupid than I thought, you shouldn’t taunt us,” the archer said calmly, no danger in sight.

“Why?” Loki defied, aware of what he was doing: rejecting Stark’s advice and any claim he could draw from it. “You’ll throw me from the tower again? Can you do any better?”

The archer stood. “Because I can see it, I can see you running out of energy to keep fighting; the end of your efforts. You are full of will now, but you get empty inside all too soon. You want to stop the fight too; you want silence and peace because there is too much noise. You want to curl up in a dark corner and throw all you worked for away. You want to give up and there is only a small ray of hope keeping you together.”

Loki crossed his arms and kept listening.

“It is not new, that edge. You have wanted to give up for a long time now, you have rejected people, cutting ties, minimizing the effort, giving in to apathy. It is easier than fighting all of them all the time, and now you are even rejecting yourself, your own life. You want to give up with every step of the way. You barely know why you fight anymore, why you wake up in the morning, and put on clothes, and eat, and go on, just to go to sleep and repeat it all over again.”

Loki noticed that the grip on his crossed arms was too tight, so he tried to consciously loosen the clasp of his fingers. “And one day you will ask yourself _why_ and you will no longer have a reason. You are almost drowning in yourself already, and you are tired. At night, when nobody can see you, you wonder if stopping would be the final release.”

Loki couldn’t say that the voice was hypnotic, because it was grating on his nerves; it felt uncomfortable and he couldn’t ignore it. Loki looked outside, at the windows, trying to ignore the archer watching the red sky. The Hawk didn’t let him that respite.

“When I threw you the other day, behind the rabid animal wanting to survive, there was a part of you, wondering what would happen if you didn’t bother to teleport, and that part answered, _not much_ , nobody would really miss me, nobody would care, some would actually be happier.” The archer sat back down. “You want to give up on _everything_.

“You don’t do it, of course,” he broke the magic again with a nonchalant gesture, slurping the last sip of coffee and speaking in a higher pitch. “Because you are a stubborn son of a bitch and you keep fighting every morning, but don’t believe yourself out of my range.”

Stark had approached them and he sat on the arm of the couch the archer was occupying. “Clint,”

“What? I didn’t cross the line.” The archer complained.

“You have crossed many lines, Clint,” the Widow said from her position at the back.

“Dear, honey, feather of my heart,” Stark said, mocking-sweetly, before turning deadly serious. “I told him not to taunt you.”

“What?! Shit, then of course he did! Why would you do such a stupid thing when it was you who said that he is mostly-” The archer had been about to say something juicy, because Stark stopped him.

“That I didn’t think he was Nat’s or Brucie’s? Because I wasn’t _sure!_ ”

“Then he IS!” There was a significant look between them, that the Widow understood, but from which Loki was excluded. It was of no consequence, since Loki only registered the conversation as background noise while looking out the windows.

“You are a stupid, reckless idiot, Tony.” The archer looked slightly worried at Loki.

“Thanks, I try, but I was right.” He didn’t sound as smug as an ‘I was right’ merited.

Both looked at Loki, who was standing without paying attention to them.

“I guess!” The archer stood and threw his hands into the air.

“So…” Stark pushed.

“He isn’t mine, but he should watch his step, because he _could_ be.” The archer pointed a finger at Loki, but he was looking at Stark.

The remains of the unkind spell dissipated in the air. Loki finally saw the window instead of staring blankly at it while introspecting. For some reason, he felt drained and dizzy, his muscles felt heavy and lax, but not relaxed, despite his breathing having slowed down. The couches looked soft and comfortable, but who could tell if sitting was seen as a sign of laziness? He wasn’t going to try, so he straightened his spine and fought to keep at bay the aftershocks of the spell.

“You are not forgiven for Coulson.” The archer didn’t seem as confrontational as before, but Loki was still fighting himself, so he was out of words. In fact, he felt out of everything, empty.

“C’mon, Cupid. Your paper pusher is fine. Let the Kitten reboot in peace.”

Loki jumped (and immediately hid it with a short step back) when he felt a warm mug of tea being pushed against his hand. Doctor Banner didn’t meet his eyes after leaving the mug with Loki; the doctor stood by his side and pretended to be interested in Stark’s and the archer’s bantering. Stark said something about bed and it being too soon for birds to be peeping. They left the room soon after that.

Loki looked at the mug. He didn’t drink, of course, he didn’t even let himself smell it, but it was a grounding weight in his hands. It was an anchor for his wandering mind, the thoughts of meaningless efforts, unfulfilled promises, and worthless monsters. The heat of the drink and the first rays of sunshine on his skin felt soothing.

“You are quiet today,” said a familiar voice with an unfamiliar wary tone.

Looking up from the mug and the light playing on the rim, Loki realized that he had been absent for longer than he had thought and Dr. Banner had left. Thor, who was intently looking at Loki, had just closed a door behind him; the Widow was there too, busying herself talking with Potts, whom Loki hadn’t seen coming either.

The owners of the tower probably had means to spy on them from afar, if Roger’s adamantly insisting to leave the tower the previous day was anything to go by. In fact, the others were probably spying just as much as the Widow, so her staying was merely a means to intimidate him.

“And you come early,” Thor insisted while walking closer and waiting impatiently to be acknowledged.

“I did.”

Loki couldn’t deal with Thor, not when he was feeling so numb. He needed to _think_ of a way to trick or convince Thor, he didn’t have many chances left, but his thoughts kept drifting. This chance, though, it wouldn’t come back, and Loki doubted those sins would let him breathe and come later.

“Thor.” His voice was weak, so he coughed and started again. “Thor, you” _are saying the obvious again._ Loki had to start again; he shouldn’t anger Thor. “I hope I didn’t disturb your sleep, but I have been thinking awake in bed. You won’t change your mind, even if your family, friends or Asgard needs you. You don’t see that Midgard won’t be enough for you one day-”

“Aye, Loki, but I still feel as strongly as yesterday-” Thor interrupted.

“I understand-” Loki interrupted back.

“You… do?” Thor was confused.

Loki belatedly realized that he was using the same tactic as Stark; agreeing to get past the other’s defenses and strike from inside. His mind had just jumped to the last ploy worth of notice. It was annoying that it had come from the human.

“I do. Midgard is out of Odin’s shadow. And you are so desperate to be free of his judgment that you’d throw caution to the void and take your chances with mortals.”

“I made you understand at last!” Thor exclaimed as if he himself had managed a great feat making Loki appreciate his cunning plan. “I feared you’d lose your soul trying, but now that you have desisted-”

“I didn’t say I desisted.” Thor scowled and Loki hid a small smile.

“This venture is not without its reason, but let me help you to plan.”

“What do you mean?” Thor crossed his arms, unknowingly defensive.

“What will happen when I come back home, with a damaged soul, empty-handed, and unable to tell what happened, as per our deal?”

Thor didn’t stop to think his answer. “Don’t go back! Stop risking your soul!” Thor’s anger mounted. “I know you can be more intelligent than this.”

Thor’s words hurt, especially because they woke the dark thoughts that Loki couldn’t completely banish, but Loki left his mug on a nearby table and put a hand on his brother’s shoulder with a tired sigh that he didn’t have to pretend.

“Nothing would please me more than leaving Odin behind to stay here by your side,” _Lie,_ those dark thoughts reminded him. “But the result would be the same: Midgard sequestered Asgard’s prince.” Loki closed his eyes, he had wanted to say _princes_ but he simply couldn’t anymore. “It’s reason enough to go to war. Thor, this realm will be annihilated, even if you protect them. Odin will reduce it to ashes and drag you from the remains while their corpses are still warm.

“You have not met humans as I have, Loki.” Thor shook his head. “Together and with me at the front of their warriors, we could give Odin reasons to leave me alone.”

“Would humans give you the lives of their warriors?” Loki asked, genuinely interested, pulling back. He retrieved the mug, to give his hands something to do instead of reaching for his magic. The Widow was still at the back of the room; Loki used the lull in their conversation to keep an eye on her.

“I don’t see why not. I’m still a god after all.”

The oaf actually believed what he said! Loki couldn’t read the Widow; other races were always trickier, but he intuited a frown. She knew, as Loki did, that humans valued their lives more than a prince of a foreign realm.

“Let’s do this differently, Thor. I can trick Odin into sending you here, Frigga will help, but for that you need to come. Don’t trap yourself here,” it hurt his pride, but Loki was getting out of options, “please.”

There was a whistle from behind Thor. Both Loki and Thor looked back to see the new eavesdroppers; Stark and Banner again, without the archer. Loki would have noticed the exact moment when they came in if he had been well. Instead, he was using most of his concentration to stay away from poisonous thoughts and the rest was consumed by Thor.

“We’re already in the begging part? What did I miss?” the acerbic human said while he got comfortable next to the other humanlings.

“Thor forgot to tell us that his warmongering father could raze our planet without much effort if we keep hiding him.” The Widow didn’t believe in sugarcoating unless necessary, apparently.

There was a stunned silence that spoke volumes about what they were thinking.

“But we can’t throw him out,” Banner stated. “Coulson said the cynosure is aligned to him.”

“That would be Coulson’s trouble to solve; and it is not impossible. What we really can’t, and I mean physically, is force him to leave.” The Widow crossed her arms.

“I could block the power in the tower and whoever is looking for him could pick him up, but that is not the question. Earth can’t afford to yield now that those other realms have noticed us. If we hand Thor over, we will be seen as weak, intimidated, and expendable. Other worlds won’t think twice about exploiting us, slaving us, or invading us. Is that how you want Earth to make her entrance in intergalactic politics?”

“Tony.”

“What, Brucie?”

“Shove the Merchant of Death back in the closet.”

“He is right,” the Widow came to his defense. “Historically, a nation that backs off from a conflict without enough power to stand against others becomes subservient to a stronger nation. If Thor doesn’t leave on his own, there is nothing we can do, but fight along him to have any chance of humans living free.”

Of course at that point the three part-humans looked at Thor. It was easy to guess the question and Thor’s answer, but it didn’t happen out loud. Instead, Thor turned to Loki.

“LOKI!”

The alluded god had known that Thor wouldn’t leave on his own now that he had made up his mind, but the vitriol with which Thor said his name still sent an electrifying shiver up Loki’s neck. Loki turned his attention from the mildly competent strategy talk: Thor was red in the face.

“This is your trick! You wanted to threaten them through me! Coward! Not even Jotuns are as treacherous as you. How blind I’ve been! I see again why everyone says you are a viper in court.”

Loki could try to defend himself, but that had never worked and it wouldn’t start to work now. He had taken the mention of treacherous Jotuns with a feeble spirit, but now, with this new failure and Thor’s immediate accusations, he was even more drained than before. And Thor wasn’t done yet.

“You will go back to Asgard.” He pointed a finger to Loki’s face and tried to intimidate him, despite being more or less the same high. “I don’t care if you have a soul by then, but you won’t have me, and Odin will punish you as you deserve for failing him on this too. You are but a vicious scoundrel and I really hope someone manages to find and keep your soul so I don’t have to see you in the afterlife. However, I doubt a soul can be found in that heartless and cold chest of yours.”

Thor turned and stomped away at the same time as Loki twitched, chipping a big triangle off of his mug with his thumb in the process. The chip fell inside the lukewarm tea. Loki was never meek, unless some scheme forced him to pretend, but he left the broken mug again on the table all too carefully and proceeded to retreat to the elevator without a word.

“Jarvis, block.”


	7. Tactics, Toast and Trust

The door of the elevator didn’t open and Loki knew it was Stark’s fault, but he didn’t have the energy to glare, he needed to leave. He would have clawed the door open if he could. Loki could feel the edges of his endurance coming closer; it was too much and something was about to give. _Something_ was going to happen and the humans would _see_ it.

Loki could pick up the pieces of himself after it happened; he knew he could put himself back together, but not now. Not in front of them. Why wouldn’t they let him leave?

“Kitten, you shouldn’t-” Stark had gotten closer and he touched Loki’s arm. It was too much.

“I shouldn’t what?! Keep trying?! Keep crashing against the same wall of bricks from different angles as I’ve been doing for millennia?! There is no choice for me.” Loki slapped the offending limb away. “You won’t make me give up now so easily. I have three opportunities left and I plan to use all of them.” Loki wasn’t looking at the Midgardians, he was frantically looking for any other way to leave. He was angry, because anger was easier to admit than being hurt. He couldn’t be weak now.

“Odinson,” Banner tried to say, wisely staying away from him. “What Tony was trying to say is that you shouldn’t go out and stay alone.”

Loki looked at his own reflection in the elevator door. He looked unhinged and tired even in the blurry shapes of the steel; an easy prey. He had lowered his guard enough times around them.

“I won’t be made into someone’s amusement because you think me weak.” Loki looked away from the door, considering even jumping from the window, but what the archer had said, about Loki not teleporting in time, it had left a mark.

“I told you not to taunt Clint,” said Stark, once again too close, in a calm voice.

“Tony, do you think now is the moment for I-told-you-so? Especially coming from you?”

Loki fixed his eyes on Stark, not the doctor with the good intentions. Stark was looking back, deep into Loki’s eyes, instead of answering to Banner. Loki understood. It wasn’t a reproach, Stark had probably guessed that Loki would do it, maybe it was a way of testing him, but now Stark’s comment was only a reminder of a freely given advice. It had been a show of goodwill that extended now, blocking the door for some reason.

 It was a _trust me_ without words, because Loki was starting to see that Stark valued unsaid words even more than the ones said aloud.

Loki nodded his understanding. It didn’t make him feel better or any less trapped, but he let Stark keep talking.

“Have you had breakfast at this awful hour? There must be something edible for an alien in the kitchen and Cap will come from his completely unnecessary morning routine with bags from the closest bakery.”

“I don’t…”

“You don’t have to talk or even listen if you don’t want to.” Banner picked the broken mug from the table. “But don’t stay alone.” He emptied the mug and left both the chip and the mug on the counter to be fixed later. “It gets worse faster when you are alone.”

Banner told Stark to stop overwhelming Loki and to make himself useful making omelettes. Stark whined about chemistry, cooking, and how it didn’t make sense. The Widow cut vegetables, checked Loki on the reflections of the tiles and made fun of Stark while Banner put the pans on the fire and soon there was a delicious smell floating in the air. The three of them adopted a domestic behavior, ignoring Loki, but leaving an obvious empty stool if he wanted to join.

 The doors of the empty elevator opened a few feet away from Loki. Stark, who hadn’t touched a single cooking utensil so far, put a fourth plate on the counter and briefly met his eyes. Loki thought of leaving: he’d find a dark place to hide, pick another phone, and probably wallow in his failures instead of reading. But if he stayed, maybe he could find something useful, or so he told himself.

He made his way to the empty stool more or less at the same time as the first plate arrived to the table. The humans talked about morning people, about coffee, about convivence, about inconsequential things that seemed to be true in all the realms. Both the conversation, and knowing that he didn’t have to participate, calmed Loki down enough to eat something. Then the Widow threw a question his way.

“How much of the war you mentioned was designed to scare Thor?” Loki eyed her warily. It made sense; they were worried about their world and plotting how to save it, that’s why they had made Loki stay. “No, I can’t wait and there won’t be a better moment,” she added.

Loki looked at the other side of the table, where Banner and Stark hid matching aborted attempts at subtle gestures. Well, at least not all of them had been scheming, it seemed.

“Not much,” Loki conceded.

Banner sighed; it looked like he didn’t like being dragged to this particular conversation. “A war would be as bad for us as for you. Losing one life to it is already one too many.”

“But if we can’t save Earth, we will avenge it. We won’t go down on one knee and kiss boots in surrender.” Stark pushed his food around the plate as he said it.

“We’ll take with us as many as possible,” the Widow said, sounding much less remorseful.

Loki looked at the three of them: they were uncomfortable in different degrees, but they weren't truly people of war like the Asgardians. “There is no need to tell me; I fought wars and avoided them in council.” Loki thought about his possibilities. He could keep them on their toes, but if he offered a way out, there was much to be gained. “If I go back to Asgard with some information, Frigga would send someone to negotiate and you could tell them Thor’s whereabouts to avoid war.”

“I smell complications.” Stark munched a piece of toast.

“Yes. You hid the prince from our best resources; you have power over Asgard. The secret could be kept for a few centuries, humans would be free, but only if you yield the source of your power: the Avengers. That is the way Odin keeps the other realms pliant.”

“Are we really considering handing Thor in against his will? That place looks tyrannical to me,” Banner asked.

“We could consult Pepper and give him political asylum if we have room to negotiate, but we need to consider all of our options.”

“Loki, do we need to worry about some space laws that humans know nothing about?”

“Not in the Nine realms. Odin’s judgment is supposed to overrule any other law, but he needs to enforce it and he has been weak lately. Elves have passed their own laws without much trouble, you have a good chance.”

“Well, if we are weighing all of our options, I’ll put out there that Stark Industries Weapons department still has the “closed” sign on a barren door and windows nailed shut.”

Loki listened intently. He might forget everything if things went wrong, but it was an interesting mental exercise; guess what Odin would do with each of the Midgardian plans. He didn’t tell them everything; Loki couldn’t shake a long-life loyalty to Asgard in a blink, but mediating was fascinating. In the last years, Loki had witnessed more hammer-wielding than word-smithing, so he wanted to appreciate this.

It was also a fantastic chance to explore the limits of those humans who had chosen to bear the burden of being heroes and sins. Loki knew they were mostly human and he saw how they danced in the limit of good and evil, like most heroes and villains. Coulson, the man he thought he had killed the first day, had some vague power over them, but he couldn’t discern any kind of real organization.

There was the issue of the feel-less magic when they proposed to use it against Asgard; they weren’t experts in their own magic. Stark considered it a source of frustration and trepidation in equal parts, but he talked about the cynosure, the scripts, the miasma, and his theories with an unending passion. Banner was sedate in his deliberations, but he always had a wise word at the end. The Widow was still the hardest to read, but she was highly adaptive in her conversation.

The elevator opened and Rogers came out with a bag hanging from one hand and brandishing a roll of glossy paper in the other.

“Tony! Have you seen this? It is not enough that they speculate about us, and that horrible article they did about Nat, now they have to drag- good morning, Loki.” The soldier’s forced gesture would have been amusing. Loki was sure he would have found a way to make him squirm, but he wasn’t in that kind of mood, even though the conversation had kept him from being drowned.

“I’ve read it on my way here, Rogers, no need to hide it.”

“Good! Now gimme,” Stark said childishly, unrolling the magazine. “They always save the best photos for the printed edition. Look at that! They dug out the Christmas charity pic! _Ass-tony-shing_ , don’t they have better puns? That is terrible. Hey, Kitten, we do look good together. Jarvis, save the new ones.”

The man kept rambling about how handsome he was while the captain looked at the weird arange of people sitting at the table with a question begging to be asked. The Widow stepped in to explain.

“Clint had a grudge, Loki didn’t trust Tony’s advice, Thor didn’t tell us some things and now we are trying to save Earth at the same time.”

“I thought we discussed yesterday that Thor needs to go back with his family,” Rogers left the bag and sat with them.

“You made your point, we made ours, we didn’t reach a conclusion, and Loki came early.” The Widow defended their actions.

“Loki” Banner asked, suddenly pensive. “If Asgard can destroy Earth and take Thor, why are you here?”

Loki was taken aback. He was used to being sent to minimize damage. Usually it meant following Thor, sometimes it meant talking to someone before they could anger Odin, and some other times it meant taking the blame. His subservience to the Odin house was something ingrained in him, and he hadn’t realized until now how automatic it was.

“As you said, war would be bad for all of us.” Loki said, instead of explaining his sudden revelation.

“War?” Rogers said, going pale.

“No, I won’t have this conversation twice. You get Cap up to date, Loki? Come, I’ve been wanting to show you the workshop.”

Stark made emphatic gestures with his hands and the elevator doors opened for him. The conversation was, indeed, going to become repetitive very soon, so nothing was holding him back. Curiosity won, especially now that he knew Stark was the main responsible of the strange magic that Loki didn’t feel, or at least the one in charge of studying it.

Loki was still feeling shaken; he had lost control since the archer interfered. In the silence of the elevator, it had to be more than obvious for Stark, who tried to make a move once they were out of the others’ sight.

“Don’t be too hard on yourself. Everyone underestimates Clint. That he showed his hand must mean that you struck a nerve there.”

Loki glared. “Don’t dare to think that you can use this against me.”

“I would hardly be a what I am if I didn’t try to take advantage.” Stark smiled wide.

“And what are you? I’m not sure you are anything but humans. And there is no leeway for you to take advantage of the situation anyway.”

“You think so, Kitten?” Stark clasped his hands behind his back with confidence, making Loki wonder if the human had found a weakness.

The doors opened and showed them to a corridor full of different kinds of insulation.

“You refused to tell me how to get Thor back, but you didn’t say telling is forbidden. You simply don’t want to tell me. I won’t forget that anytime soon, you know?” Loki clasped his hands behind his back too; mimicking made people see themselves reflected and relax. Loki doubted it would work with Stark, but trying didn’t hurt.

“Telling _is_ forbidden, but it is not a contractual silence. So far, pacts and bindings of a demonic nature have been disappointments. Expectations are stronger than the wording, it transcends languages. I can’t answer you for practical reasons, but I did tell you something.”

“Yes, but it was an obvious mockery about me loving my brother too much!”

“It is relevant, use it. Have you noticed how he only calls you Loki? Also, I told you to be careful with Clint.”

“You suspected that I was going to ignore you.”

“I suspected you were going to get _curious_ , maybe ask someone. Jumping right into the flames to get your answer? That was reckless and unexpected.” Stark had a dreamy smile plastered on his face. Loki guessed it was about the reckless and unexpected behavior, since the press seemed to love those words to describe Stark.

“Ok, welcome to my evil lair… Now that I think about it, this looks nothing like the workshop used to look before Coulson.”

Stark presented proudly what he called the workshop. He walked Loki through all of it and he explained that it was also a laboratory and part-library. It also rivaled Odin’s vault in terms of security and Loki’s room in terms of Chaos: the dwarfish-like tools for welding were right next to tubes of solutions and a plant that moved mechanically. There were symbols that Loki didn’t recognize in all the working surfaces, the ceiling and the floor. There were tubes and cables, hanging from the ceiling; stacks of paper, parchment and papyrus next to a tablet. Different areas, which Stark called stations, were lighted differently and the ongoing projects looked like the dreams of a madman with a high fever.

“I equipped it with a bit of everything, since I end up using chemistry, physics or linguistics equally when I have supernatural stuff in my hands.”

In Loki’s expert opinion, it was a Sanctuary.

The great minds inclined to Seidr always had Sanctuaries. Not the warlocks and the sorcerers, but the ones who had the power to create new spells. The mages who understood magic had a protected place where natural laws had no business trespassing. Loki had tried to create one such place for a few centuries, but he had had to study at the same time as he fulfilled his duties as the second prince of Asgard.

He couldn’t leave those issues unattended for months on end to study seidr properly, so he had abandoned his studies in favor of… in favor of Asgard. He had fooled himself into thinking that the world was his Sanctuary, he had told himself that he liked working spells more than researching them, but it was the kind of unattainable delusion that plagued him from time to time.

“I’m trying to apply reverse engineering in all the spells we have learnt use. I take you like it?”

 _YES_ was the answer he couldn’t utter without giving away too much of himself. He liked the experiments, he liked the active aspect of it, he liked the meticulous care in the mess... “Why am I here?” was what he said out loud.

Sanctuaries, in Loki’s experience, were something deeply personal. He had been allowed into two of them, because Loki could be charming and useful at the same time if he put his mind to it. It didn’t make sense that Stark would simply let him in.

“Well, I thought you’d be at home here, but also, since you are the one disrupting my experiments every time you come,” Stark pushed a burnt mechanical piece with his foot. “I thought ‘hey! Let’s see what happens!’”

Loki didn’t even wonder if it was a trap; he took off his bracelets and called his seidr under Stark’s scrutiny. Loki didn’t feel an answer, just as the previous times, but the burnt machine vibrated, and the rest of the workshop suffered disruptions of multiple kinds.

Loki looked at Stark discretely. If any mage found someone else had been destroying their investigations, the culprit would suffer the consequences. However, Stark was ecstatic. He pushed down Loki’s stretched hands with a radiant smile.

“Whatever you are doing works in a similar wave as mine, but different enough to make it incompatible. You are a mystery, Kitten.”

Loki was confused by this particular sin. He seemed to have interests beside the ones dictated by his… title? Whatever that title was. He had seen the others live as basic beings, interested in survival, fight, revenge, feelings of worry, channeling their assigned temptation… but this kind of interest was intriguing. Maybe the others were just as complex, but they hadn’t shown.

Unless Stark was jealousy and the display was designed to appeal to Loki. It wasn’t working. Loki had been trained to be a warlock, to be useful in battle. He could appreciate the hard work, but it wasn’t something Loki had any chance of calling his own, so there was no point in jealousy, even if he could enjoy his stay.

Stark leaned his hip against the worktable, not quite hiding the device behind him. It was an inviting picture that made Loki think of the models in the human magazines he had seen. Loki took his eyes from Stark and walked around the Sanctuary, taking in everything he could. Experiments with water repulsion, experiments with living tissues, experiments with motherboards… Those kind of experiments were long-term and well thought. Stark couldn’t have been able to set everything up just to tempt Loki.

“You haven’t asked me to stop calling you Kitten, Kitten.” Stark liked attention, like Thor, Loki noted.

“Calling enemies pejorative names to lower their morals is not a tactic exclusive from Midgard.” Loki turned the model of something named Boson in his right hand. It looked like the an enlarged creation spell. He ignored Stark’s face on purpose. “It is not working, if you were wondering.”

“That’s not what it is.” Loki could hear the frown in his voice. “It is supposed to be friendly, just-” Stark looked at Loki closely. “You use it exactly the same in Norseland don’t you? Of course you do, asshole.”

Loki let go of the smirk he was holding and continued his exploration, calling seidr randomly and relishing how it made Stark trail him and everything he did like an imprinted duckling.

 “We should restart the deal,” Stark said when curiosity was too much for him. “What I have figured out of this versus what you can bring on the table. ”

“I don’t think so,” Loki said, to Stark’s dismay. It was exactly what Loki had wanted to see. “We don’t need a deal to make sure we are telling the truth when we have proof in front of us.”

Stark grinned and turned to the worktable with the blue lightning. “I like how you think, so what can you tell me?”

The next hours were a mix of showmanship, competition, and one-upping each other. They still didn’t know why there were different kinds of magic, but they were starting to understand why they interacted with each other. Loki found that it was the lead bracelets keeping the energies flowing in different planes, which let spells work at the same time.

“By the way, you should have this too.” Stark threw a red and black box at Loki, when one of those magic-infused drones left food for both Stark and Loki, distracting them from the magic.

Loki opened the box, but the contents were already obvious. The Stark phone on the cover was a dead giveaway. There was a charger too, and Stark informed him that as long as he was on Earth he wouldn’t have to worry about credit.

“Why would I want this?” Loki asked, plugging his new phone to charge it anyway.

“Because I have been following the trail of a phone-stealing crook who was terribly careless and looked up a lot of stuff about the Avengers and the seven sins.” Loki rose an eyebrow and Stark shrugged. “I might as well do it overtly and save a few citizens their phones.”

“You are no fun.” Loki smiled while the screen of his new phone lighted up and asked for a password. Truth was, he didn’t mind the spying, but it had been refreshingly unexpected.

“I’m lots of fun! Having to track down the owners of the phones is what spoiled my fun.” Loki fumbled through the basic steps until he could control his contacts. Stark looked at him intently through the whole process. “Why are you looking like that?” he said when Loki was content with the settings and looking expectantly.

“I’m waiting. Shouldn’t you be trying to give me your number?”

“And give you a way to bother me? Nope. I have your number, though, I could give it to that magazine and they would make your life a living hell even more than us.”

“Be careful of what you say, human,”Loki laughed. “I’ll tell the magazine what a terrible lover you are.”

“Good luck with that. I’ve been accused of being a playboy for so long that nobody will believe that one.”

Since there were no numbers incoming, Loki opened the back of the phone and carved three runes in it. One to protect it from hits or water, other to prevent its theft and a last one to keep it from magic interference. He’d add more if it was necessary later, but the runes had piqued Stark’s interest and they spent several more hours going over written forms of magic.

They had been in the workshop-sanctuary for so long that they had found a rhythm. It was comfortable for a pair of enemies; Loki could even say that it felt friendly. The situation changed drastically when Jarvis, the digital mind that Stark had created and introduced to Loki earlier, sounded the alarm.


	8. Green with…

Stark had to rush to the common rooms and Loki followed because he had nothing better to do. The Widow was there to show them a building and blurry pictures of designs in blue paper. She informed them that someone named Ross had designed armor like Stark’s with the help of someone else named Doom. His aim, according to the names on the project, was Banner.

The Widow explained that it would be a discrete mission. She had already deleted the digital copies; they only had to go on-site to destroy the paper copies, the early stages of the design and any traces of the Hulk-fighter.

Thor would leave Mjolnir behind to prove how well he could fight without it. Thor, Rogers, and the archer would take the jet to the base, Stark would fly along, Banner would stay protected in the tower. The Widow stayed too, to keep Banner calm and try to find Ross.

“Hey Kitten, we will finish that portable shielding spell as soon as we are back. Wait for me.”

“I don’t know; ransacking your Workshop seems more productive.”

“You can’t use it without me.”

“I’ll find a substitute.”

“There is no substitution for this fine ass.”

“Good luck, guys!” Banner interrupted Loki and Stark.

Once they were alone, with the news channel on and the communication links open, the Widow asked Jarvis to call and invite someone called Foster to the penthouse. Banner’s confused stare and Thor’s gasp in the comms were all Loki needed to know who the woman was. She confirmed it when she came in asking worriedly if “he” was fine.

The woman was quickly introducing herself to Banner on the other side of the room and prattling on the comms about how she met Thor the other day because of a misunderstanding. Thor filled in with comments of his own, and Loki realized that he sounded kinder when talking to her. Loki couldn’t stand looking at Doctor Foster, because she was one more reason on the pile of why Thor wouldn’t go back to Asgard.

The sight of Mjolnir on the table wasn’t helping. It was innocently sitting next to them, balance upset as if it would topple over at the slightest touch. Loki knew Thor adored leaving his hammer like that to taunt innocent bystanders.

Then the mission went wrong. It started with Roger’s comment upon entering the building. “Romanoff, this base looks harmless; most wings are abandoned.”

Then it continued with Stark saying “These blueprints are actually mine, not Doom’s, this is my hulkbuster. Only Avengers can access these files.”

And with the archer voicing his suspicion, “Nat! What have you done? Where did you send us? What are you planning?”

And Thor ended the mission quite abruptly. His last comment was “Friends, I can take care of this. I’ll bring this evil lair down.” just before he pushed the bearing wall.

With the other Avengers still inside.

The shouts of “Thor!”, “Wait”, and “no” mixed together in the comms. The following noise of destruction was deafening, but some shouts could be heard over the noise. Loki bolted from the place where he had been sitting and looking, but the Widow held his arm firmly.

“Wait.”

“I can help,” Loki said through clenched teeth.

“You can make it worse.”

“Are you sure I can?” Loki sent her a nasty look.

They turned their attention to the action. As soon as the rumbling was over, the comms were full of worry over Clint, the archer, who had been on the jet and wasn’t injured. Stark and Rogers emerged from the rubble shortly after and Loki breathed. He wasn’t worried about his enemies, not at all, but he had seen enough people hurt by his brother’s quest for ‘might’.

The News channel started to broadcast the place that had just been leveled. Some reporter had approached enough to call Thor’s attention and had started an interview. In the back of the picture, the other three heroes were moving pieces of the fallen building, taking the surviving enemies to the emergency services and the paramedics to the victims that couldn’t be moved. Clint helped to take the stabilized patients to the closest hospital in the jet. All three of them were asking who the hell had told the press so fast.

In the tower, Loki tried again to go to help, but the Widow’s firm grip prevented him from acting. The interview to the New Avenger who stood proudly in front of the world overlapped with the chat in the comms and the muffled cries for help that came from the debris and the worried words of Banner and Jane. Thor was explaining to the reporter that his weapon of choice was his hammer; Mjolnir vibrated on the table and flew away, breaking a window in the process. A minute later, Thor was showing Mjolnir on the TV.

The interview had to be cut short because other people had approached to give their warm welcomes and congratulations. It seemed like Thor was equally well-loved across the galaxies, maybe with the exception of the Jotuns. Loki had never understood why Thor could blunder his way into all kinds of trouble and come out with his reputation intact.

Thor came to the tower with his hammer when the press left, before the mission was over. The other Avengers were still on the back of the TV news footage, working to save people while Thor talked with Doctor Foster, who was worried about him. Loki was mildly dismayed. It wasn’t that he wanted a human’s affections, but she had run to his arms despite the destruction that Thor had caused.

Loki disregarded the Widow’s order to stay and gathered as much seidr as his lead bracelets let him in order to teleport to the site of the collapse. Therefore, Loki wasn’t there when doctor Foster turned from the concerned party to the furious party who scolded Thor for endangering lives so lightly. He wasn’t there to see the Widow smirk privately either.

Meanwhile Loki was with Captain America (Loki had to admit that he wasn’t just _Rogers_ on the battleground), and used his magic to detect signs of life and Stark (who was Stark with or without the suit of armor), who suggested to phase part of some structures so the paramedics could get to the victims with ease.

It took them several dramatic hours where they found wounded, but also dead bodies, to vacate the building from all signs of what used to be life. Loki didn’t care about humans. They were ants! Meaningless! They had lives so short… so short that not a moment should be wasted. On top of that, Loki couldn’t forget that the people they were trying to help were, in fact, enemies of the Avengers, acolytes of Ross.

Loki found himself trying to heal them without remembering that he was doing this to help the Avengers and control Thor’s damage. Some were lucky Loki knew how to heal wounds that would have been fatal or crippling, some were not so lucky. Loki had to bear witness to every disappointed face when he couldn’t save one of them.

In the end, there wasn’t anything else for the Avengers to do but to veil the bodies. They headed back to the tower in separate ways. The Hawk was in charge of flying the jet back while Stark insisted on flying to ‘decompress’, whatever that was, and the Captain accepted a ride with Loki.

Once there, Loki stopped being of any relevance at all; he was dismissed with a pat on the back. The Widow was conversing with Rogers in a hushed voice, probably about the mission. Banner and Potts, who had come to ask about the sudden mission, were being introduced to Jane and they were listening to Thor’s latest brave foolhardiness.

Loki didn’t really check if the looks directed Thor’s way were friendly or not. He was too used to his brother being the hero despite his actual actions, everything directed to Thor was a compliment or a friendly taunt. Loki was used to standing with awed multitudes, and for that reason, he had learnt to disregard their mindless devotion and seek the approval from his chosen ones, mainly Frigga.

Stark made himself known as soon as he was in the vicinity, Potts took him aside to organize PR and how Stark Industries was going to help further. The Hawke arrived with the jet some time later, but he and Banner guided Jane away from the top floors and they didn’t come back.

Slowly, the room vacated. The Widow pushed Potts and Rogers away to confer with the other teammates who were already in a different sound-proof room. Stark was left behind, talking with Thor so he wouldn’t interrupt their impromptu reunion. However, the maneuver was so smooth that Loki didn’t notice anyone giving the order. All he saw was Stark, who had promised a shielding experiment after their return, and his brother speaking. He approached ready to ask Stark if he was going to be ready anytime soon.

“What is the range of that thing? What kind of frequency does it use?” Stark was asking Thor and pointing at the hammer.

“It is magic; it reaches as far as I call,” Thor was beaming, even though he had just explained the same thing to the reporter.

“But what magic? Did you... make it?” Stark made complicated circling motions with his hands. Loki saw in it an instinctive gesture to call magic.

“No. It was a gift from the Dwarves.” Loki didn’t roll his eyes. Loki had bugged the dwarves until they gave Mjolnir to Thor because Loki had seen how much his brother wanted the weapon. Thor always omitted that, though.

“You...” Stark crossed his arms. “Maybe you should come to the workshop so I can take a scan of it.”

Loki felt a pang of envy and betrayal strong as he hadn’t felt since he was a child; it was choking jealousy. He wanted to be angry, because Thor was there again, making Loki redundant, but he knew he couldn’t be angry. Stark only wanted any kind of information about magic and Loki wasn’t enough; Loki was just another means to an end. It was just a practical choice, a commodity.

Loki didn’t want to listen to the conversation, nor ask if Stark wanted to go back to the workshop. Loki had given it too much importance, calling it a Sanctuary. Stark had let Loki in so easily... Loki should have realized... and now he was going to take Thor. It made much more sense that he would take the one who was his teammate, but Thor didn’t know the first thing about magic, he was useless there, Loki was the expert.

Loki eyed the elevator. He didn’t want the door to stay closed for him, and he didn’t have enough energy to teleport, so he walked outside to the balcony where nobody else would see him. The feeling was clamping his throat and, even more worrying, it was mounting. He wanted to eviscerate someone, but he was blind to reason and he didn’t know who exactly he wanted to eviscerate. He could just feel and it hurt; there was no escaping it, no control, no reason, it was maddening.

“I will stop it now, but you have to admit defeat,” the Widow had come quietly and she had whispered those words that made Loki finally understand the trap now that the teeth had sunk.

Loki barked a deprecating laugh that worsened the pain, because it sparked more untamed jealousy. “I had suspected you’d be lust,” he said closing his eyes.

“And I use that to its full potential every time it happens,” maybe she said it with a note of mockery, or maybe in all seriousness, but Loki couldn’t discern the difference.

The pain of jealousy intensified again. It was beyond any common feeling, unnatural, and it burned everywhere, aimlessly destroying him inside. Everything felt tender and breakable under its touch. Loki slid his back against the wall and sat on the floor; it didn’t help. That magic, the one Stark had showed him placidly obeying its master’s orders was now wild. Thinking about Stark didn’t help either.

Loki wanted to fight back and demonstrate that he wasn’t the jealous brother he was always accused of being. He wanted to prove that Thor could keep the throne a thousand times, but he couldn’t lie to himself with the spell affecting him. There were things of Thor that he wanted, even if the throne wasn’t one. Loki closed his eyes, unwilling to give up.

“Romanoff!” that was Roger’s voice. No. Captain America’s voice. “This wasn’t the plan!”

“The plan was in tatters. I had a better one and you were discussing technicalities.”

“Nat, what are you doing?” That one was Stark’s voice. Loki could pretend that it sounded hurt if he kept his eyes closed.

“Widow!” And that was the unmistakable voice of his brother.

Loki opened one eye. Jane wasn’t there, but all the other sins were. His brother looked angry, but his grip on Mjolnir was relaxed, he wasn’t about to attack, then. Thor wasn’t going to fight for him. Another pang of jealousy made him twist inwards, even though he knew the pain wasn’t physical. The Widow was unintentionally shielding Loki from the others, Rogers was in her personal space with a scowl worth of Odin himself. Banner was moving his fingers nervously, and Potts was holding Stark back, who was looking at Loki with wide eyes and at the Widow with a deep resentment.

Loki simply couldn’t think of what that could mean. If the archer’s manipulation had left him empty and numb, the Widow had left him with cuts and dipped him in acid. Numbness wasn’t anywhere to be found. He only wanted to claw eyes out and cause misery, Thor’s misery if possible, but at that point anyone would do; Loki would do.

Among the bitterness, Loki could hear someone threatening the Widow. But that wasn’t right, Loki would have done the same: tricks.

“She isn’t at fault. She won. I yield.” Loki turned his eyes to her. “My soul is yours.” There was a shocked silence that was probably short-lived, but the pain drew it out for Loki. “Now make this GO!”

Loki knew it was working because soon enough he didn’t want to strangle more than usual, but he also felt a sediment of the magic staying behind. It didn’t burn, but it weighted, unmovable, and Loki wondered if that was where the soul was supposed to be. It felt very close to his Seidr, extracorporeal, maybe he should have asked what humans considered a soul, but the texts he had read were so vague that he wasn’t sure humans knew the answer themselves. Now it seemed like a relevant question.

The Widow extended a hand and he took it to stand up. He didn’t dare look anyone in the eye, especially not Thor; instead he braced an arm against his chest, where it had hurt the most, and he looked intently at the ground. He had failed yet again. He had fallen against a creature that had barely lived as much as an Asgardian child, creatures who were mostly humans.

“What is the meaning of this, Romanoff?” The Captain hissed between his teeth. “We need to discuss this. I’ll call Coulson and you will explain to us why you deviated from our plans.”

Loki risked a look from behind his eyelashes. Everyone was looking accusingly at the Widow while she shared a complicit look with Potts and ignored her Captain.

“There is no time for any of that. Loki,” she said it like she expected to be obeyed. Loki stood to attention, if only to see where all of this was going. “I have a mission for you: Go to Asgard, do everything in your power to protect Earth. Do whatever needs to be done.”

Loki waited expectantly, bracing himself for the pull that came with hastily done mind spells. The pull didn’t come. Loki looked at the Widow in confusion.

“Well?” the Widow asked. “You refuse?”

“I didn’t say so, but there is no compulsion.” Loki could definitely feel the claim that the Widow had put on him, probably because it was created specifically to be felt, so he didn’t understand why it wasn’t stirring inside him to make him obey.

“Claims are not thralls, but we don’t have time to explain how claims work. Just go, complete your mission and claim your soul back.”

Loki was quick to understand the Widow’s plan; he would have done something similar if their roles had been reversed. The others, minus Potts, looked at her weirdly.

“Saving the Earth is probably worth his soul, don’t you think?” The strange looks didn’t waver.

“Why are you doing this?” Stark asked. He was clever enough, Loki didn’t know why Stark didn’t understand the unfolding of her plan.

“I don’t actually want to keep track of him. I have enough with you, bunch of kids.” she said it with a smile, but turned serious to continue, “Now he has a reason to come back; a reason I can trust, understand, and believe. We can interrupt the game, save the world, and go back to minor issues after that.”

“You could have asked, Nat,” Rogers complained. “We could have worked together.”

“No, we couldn’t. He can tire of his brother, he can decide that Earth’s destruction is easier, he can come back with an alien army, and he knows too much. Now he can’t run away from us without leaving a piece of himself behind.”

“I’m going with him.” Banner said, cleaning his glasses.

“I-”

“No, Tony. You and diplomatic missions only work when you are not biased.” Potts cut him before he had even started.

“Biased, me?” Stark said with an innocent look.

“Like the Fox news,” she said firmly.

“Ow! That one hurt, babe.”

“Why do you want to go, Bruce?” Potts said professionally, ignoring Stark, who, by some miracle, listened.

“Everything in his power might not be enough. Especially _enough to come back_ if they turn against him.”

“I’m not accustomed to company in my quests.” At least not to company who followed him and not the opposite.

“Get used to it,” said Stark. “Bruce, be my eyes.”

“My eyes won’t go where yours want to, so don’t count on it,” Banner smirked facetiously.

Loki wondered if Banner would be a deterrent, but he didn’t mind the prospect of being followed by the man too much. He had been unobtrusive and even supporting in the short time he had known Banner. In the back of his mind, Loki accepted that he would have wanted to show Asgard to Stark as well, but he didn’t have time to analyze why.

“Stark,” Loki looked at the inventor. There was something hopeful in them and Loki didn’t want to analyze _that_ either with his mudded mind. Loki looked at the tower to avoid the intense stare. “You said you could diminish the energy of the tower to a minimum. I will need you to do that until we come back.”

“Why?” Stark’s look turned neutral quickly.

“So they see that Thor is unharmed.”

“Wouldn’t it be easier to send Thor?” the archer whispered to the Widow.

“No,” Thor answered instead.

“And there is no yes to his no, I assume,” the archer pointed dismissively with his thumb.

“You slept through this morning’s meeting.”

“Fair point.”

Loki’s patience was growing thin. He waited while Stark’s back was still in sight and on his way to turn down the power of the building, then he stopped the meaningless conversation that was taking place in the balcony.

“I don’t have time for this. Banner, come, we leave now. Brother… I’ll come back for you.”

Loki also rushed his departure because he had seen Stark’s eager face, and if he didn’t leave before Stark came back, Loki’d grab the human by the neck and drag him to Asgard too. It was fortunate that they were already outside; Loki only had to call Heimdall and a ray of light hit them, leaving behind all but Loki and Banner. Loki convinced himself that going back home without Thor wasn’t exactly a failure; he had news of him and he was prepared to give explanations. Everything would go smoothly with Frigga in the throne.


	9. Going Back to Go Forward

Going to Asgard was a relief. Not because he liked it, in fact, his hate towards the Golden Realm had been festering in his absence. However, Midgard had turned out to be unexpectedly taxing. Being with those accursed sins and their gift with sentiments had forced Loki to show more of himself than he was comfortable with. It had been worse than any fight with Thor, and it had left him raw.

None of that would have happened if Loki had been forewarned, but Loki had considered that humans were, well, just humans, and he hadn’t cared about being exposed in front of them, even with the magic help. He had paid the price of underestimating them, repeatedly.

However, the welcome sight of a human-less realm was short-lived. The first words to come out of Heimdall’s mouth were as harsh as every time Loki dared to use the Bifrost without Thor, Frigga, or Odin by his side.

“Loki, your sight is deteriorating. That isn’t Thor, or is this how you plan to justify your failure?” Loki only answered to wait until the human by his side had regained his equilibrium.

“I see this isn’t Thor, you, on the other hand, failed to see the Jotuns during the coronation. And should we tell my guest who lost sight of the banished prince first, _all-seer_?” Loki sneered.

“Midgardians were hostile, we weren’t prepared.” Heimdall had lost all the amusement from his voice. Good.

“Well, at least you can admit we weren’t prepared for the attack of some wild ants.” Loki tapped a finger against his lower lip. “You think we are prepared for butterflies? Maybe if someone had improved the Bifrost in the last ten thousand years, the flashy landing wouldn’t call the attention of all the local armed forces of a small planet. Maybe you could tell that to the one in charge of the gate.”

Heimdall was fuming inside. Loki was sure, but Heimdall wasn’t the kind of Asgardian who just exploded like Thor. He kept a stoic façade and got revenge when you least expected it. Deep down Loki respected that, but he would never say it aloud, of course.

“Where are the Warriors three and their persistent fly?”

“ _Lady Sif”_ Heimdall pronounced carefully, “and the Warriors three predicted your failure and went to search for him on their own.”

“So, besides stupid, and bad at predictions, now they are lost in a desert instead of in my way. My night keeps getting better and better.” Loki smirked and it only annoyed Heimdall more.

“They suspected you harbored ill intentions towards your brother. I can’t fault them.”

“You can’t? You really can’t?” Loki was angry now, human forgotten. “Because I can see a very big fault when they are Asgard’s first line of defense in Thor’s absence and they decide to go on a quest when the King is asleep, our security was breached not five days ago by our worst enemies; the same day the Jotuns declared war on Asgard. And yet you can see no fault in their actions?”

“You weren’t here either.”

Loki turned around and pushed Banner along. He wouldn’t discuss this with someone whose actions couldn’t change the situation in the slightest.

“You can’t let a mortal into the Realm Eternal, Loki.”

“I’m not letting him.” Loki showed his hands distinctly mocking him; he didn’t have anything to lose, after all. “See? He is doing it himself.” Then he mustered only for Banner. “Rush, he will call the guards and we have much to do before they catch up to us.”

“That big central building made of gold, with the big imposing doors is screaming ‘castle’ to me,” Banner said when they finished crossing the rainbow bridge.

“It is.”

“Why are we not going there then?”

“I’ll salvage whatever I can from this life before giving it up.”

“Loki? I won’t lie, you are worrying me, and this might not be my business, but what do you mean with ‘this life’?”

“Hush, you. If someone asks, Thor sent us to show you the magnificence of Asgard. It will save us time.”

“Time for what?”

Loki didn’t trust Banner. He had allowed his presence because it was the least of seven evils, but sharing his plans required more. Then again, he didn’t trust Asgard either, not anymore. Banner was inconsequential there; everyone would leave him alone for his human condition and for the person by his side, but someone would listen.

“I will use my time as I see convenient. You should stay close.”

Loki planned his route through the backstreets to avoid transforming his short trip into a walk of shame, but some attention was necessary. The people at the stables were probably the first ones who recognized the second prince. Loki knew that at least one of them wouldn’t keep quiet about it; sooner or later the guards would find them. He had time to free Sleipnir before that could happen.

At least Banner was a decent companion; he was quiet most of the time, but his remarks were amusing when he made them. The first comment was “that’s four more legs than what I was expecting.” and since Loki didn’t stop him, he continued. “Giant wolf, why not? Darwin would cry. But seriously, why, and _how_ do you buddy up with a wolf in the first place?!”

“Any other surprises? You should warn me, you know? I will shout and we will get caught if the guards find that a raging green monster is rampaging through their capital.”

“Snake! I told you to warn me? Don’t talk if you must, but tap me or whistle. Do Asgardians have normal pets, like dogs or hamsters?”

Banner’s monologue was of the shy, curious kind and sometimes it made Loki feel as if there was a child following him. Loki refused to answer his comments, but Asgard had ears almost everywhere, in a literal sense. It was the foremost reason why nobody ever criticized the King whether he was a good or a bad king. One of those corvid pests would report to Odin and his plans would be ruined.

Other times Loki felt pleasantly understood, like when they sneaked into the apothecary.

“I understand stealing from that library, honestly, I would have taken a few too, if I had a way to hide them, but what could you take from here… oh! Alien drugs... don’t let Steve know that I said it, but I wouldn’t mind if you took everything that could have an impact in the study of radiation.”

So of course there were radiation potions in his pocket dimension before they left, even if he didn’t tell Banner.

Banner was unsettling Loki with some of his comments too.

“Now I’m really worried. You free your pets, steal, send a lot of messages, and now you magically strip bare what looks like your room. This looks like a goodbye, do you want to talk? I’m not Clint, you can talk to me. Are you still not talking to me?”

However, the most amusing part was when Banner observed things that Loki had taken for granted. Gold was a favorite that almost got Loki to talk in several occasions.

“Explain this to me; if you have gold to waste, it means it is not that valuable, then why is your palace made of a worthless metal?”

“I guess you guys don't use gold standard.”

“Loki! Look! There is a spot without gold right there, what is that atrocity? Should we call the guards?”

Loki was also amused despite himself when the human gave voice to things that would anger Asgardians if they overheard them.

“Come to Asgard, land of peace; we have more soldiers than people.”

“Let’s build the palace of the God of Thunder with a conductive material, what could go wrong?”

“Long live the king; feared even by his own sons.”

Those mentions made Loki feel validated and made him want to fully explain Asgard to the human from a point of view that was less Thor-esque. He wanted to explain that the castle was far more full of life than usual because a war against Jotunheim was in the making, to ask what he thought about that. Maybe peace was a human way of thinking, maybe only some humans thought like that, but Loki wanted to test, to know what they thought about Asgard and the man who ruled it.

Humans were fresh eyes with their own perceptions; Loki wanted to plant them in Jotunheim too and learn what they would think of _that._ Such ideas were dangerous. Loki knew it and he knew he had to smother any new scheme, or it would cloud his mission.

By the time the guards caught up with them, Loki had done everything worth doing.

“Guards late, Odin must be on the throne.” Loki spoke his first words in the last hours.

“Why? Is there something distinctive in them?” Banner asked without missing a trick.

“No. Frigga would have welcomed us herself. And they wouldn’t be carrying chains.”

Banner noticed then the chains and stepped in front of Loki, but the guards ignored him and went to seize Loki. Fortunately for Asgard, Loki had seen footage of the Hulk and, despite his curiosity, he had a less destructive solution. Loki put a hand on Banner’s shoulder.

“Diarf and Unn, I’m glad to see you no longer fear what I could say about you.”

Both guards stopped dead in their tracks, Banner relaxed at the same time. Loki knew nothing except their names, but he had long ago learnt that people wouldn’t simply respect him like they respected Thor (mainly because Thor’s disrespect was contagious), so he had learnt ways to earn their respect or their fear. Secrets were a fantastic trade coin and everybody knew that Loki had the best secrets, that’s why he had been called a liar at first.

With a pair of much more pliant guards, Loki and Banner were escorted to the throne room. Banner was mostly ignored and nobody protested when he walked by Loki, between the pair of guards, much bigger than him. The human only doubted for a few seconds before shadowing Loki through the parting crowd of the throne room. Loki was used to being stared at, he wasn’t used to crowds parting for him, but he guessed the chains he was supposed to be carrying had something to do.

“Loki, I see you didn’t retrieve Thor,” Odin started when the group came to a stop in front of the dais and didn’t kneel.

“It was a self-imposed mission, Allfather, I can’t see why that would merit guards so kindly escorting me,” Loki half-chanted innocently.

“Don’t play games, Loki. You fled Asgard while we suffer a war.”

“Asgard has never _suffered_ a war, as you well know, Odin. Asgard has only instigated them. Eight Realms pending from the mood of Asgard’s king.”

Gasps and indignant yells flooded the room; music to Loki’s ears, but what he was about to do would ruin his reputation forever, so he might as well say everything there was to be said. The human by his side seemed to be enjoying it just as much, but in the discrete way of those used to backlash for such comments.

“How dare you?” Odin muttered darkly.

“I dare because nobody else will, Odin.” Loki enunciated clearly, to further contrast. “You have ruled with fear for so long that you forgot what criticism sounds like, and you threw your own son to unknown dangers because he _dared_.”

The murmur subsided a little. It was a very well known fact, that Frigga was the only one who could make some vague form of complaint and be listened. At that moment she was displaced, standing beside Odin in a second place, but never next to the only and great monarch. Like she was nothing. Loki finally understood why she had fought to keep the baby monster and why she had taught him magic. There was something stronger than blood linking them, but it wasn’t time for revelations.

“However, you’ll be happy to know that your son is fine. He is still in Midgard, but he is alive.”

“I can see it for myself, Loki. Do you forget the throne in which I sit?”

“I guess you are not going to wash poetic about the glorious blood spilled and the needed lies told to build that glorified chair, so yes, I remember the magic throne from which I hid Thor. I also remember lifting the spell a while ago.”

The gasps resumed. It was a delicate moment, and the reason why Loki hadn’t simply dismissed the guards. If Asgard decided to attack Loki, things would get ugly. The guards made people believe that Loki was already trapped, and that calmed the mood down just enough.

“You hid the prince from our watch.” Odin made the question in a flat, disbelieving tone. Maybe he didn’t believe Loki, maybe he did, but the crowd was always there to believe the worst of Loki without question.

“I gifted him with the only spot in the Nine Realms where he can have some privacy. It was just a brotherly boon, since there is absolutely no place where the eyes of Odin can’t see. As your sons, we find it a bit invasive and completely uncomfortable.” He said it with the tone of voice of all brats cross the realms and he gave the hint of a smile to imply what kind of activities the princes would want to hide from their father.

“If it shouldn’t be seen by the eyes of justice, it shouldn’t be done in the first place.”

“And I’m sure that is exactly the reason why everyone in Asgard is so complacent about being stripped from privacy.”

“Loki, others have died for much less than what you are saying today.”

“I didn’t say much, yet.”

Odin didn’t press the issue, proving that there was some truth to that Wisdom title. Loki saw that Banner was hiding a grin.

“You asked the queen to give Thor Mjolnir back as soon as you could. Why, if he was safe?.”

“Is it so hard to believe that I’d want my dearest brother to be safe, no matter what tricks I need to use to accomplish that goal?” Loki’s voice was dripping with sarcasm and mock-offended.

“Stop testing my patience. Why did you hide Thor, Loki? Tell the truth.”

“Truth is a weapon you should handle with care, Odin. Lies suit you better,” Loki’s tone turned slightly more serious. “But since you ask so imperviously, I did it because Asgard is growing complacent. Conforming to survival where other Realms grow and live. It was just Asgard’s security and vigilance this time, but I don’t want to see this realm wither because of stagnation.”

“You can’t say that! Asgard is grand-” Someone shouted from the multitude, louder than the murmurs.

“-and proud. Yes, I’ve heard that one before, thank you.” Loki rolled his eyes. “And we have been repeating exactly the same words without letting Asgard evolve for longer than I’ve lived. As a prince of Asgard, it is my responsibility to point out our faults, since you, Odin, have given our people no voice in front of you.”

“Fine, Loki. Tell our guards what manner of spell you used and you’ll avoid punishment for what you said.”

“I don’t think I will, Odin, because if I don’t tell, someone will have to figure it out and this realm will have the first original idea in millennia. It will be a nice change from the usual, which is me fixing it. Don’t worry, thinking is not contagious, but I don’t have the cold heart to deprive Asgard from that.”

“Loki…”

“Are you going to punish me? The same way you exiled Thor for calling you a fool?”

“Guards! Take him to the dungeons!”

Before the guards could touch him, Loki stepped forward, confident grin in place. He had missed using his masks, no matter how cathartic Midgard had been; he was far more comfortable behind a public mask. Now was time for the final lines of the act.

“I won’t go to the dungeons.”

“And why do you think so, with the things you said? It is high treason!”

“You think you can judge me, _father_ ,with _Aesir_ laws?”

Loki saw Odin lose some of his colour when he realized the implications. _I’ll show everyone_ , _it will be my end, but I’ll drag you down._ It was a lie. Loki couldn’t physically nor mentally show his blue skin in court, but the ire in both Loki’s and Odin’s eyes made the lie believable.

“We will speak in private.”

New cries of outrage emerged from the throne room, but for the first time, the cries were directed at Odin. He was being accused of nepotism and Odin couldn’t tell the truth because it was far worse than a mere preferential treatment.


	10. The End of the Lie

The guards flanked Loki and Banner to one of the luxurious rooms where Odin received dignitaries and let them rant and feel in power, just to ignore their existence as soon as they left. The guards left and Odin entered through the same doors not a minute later.

“What is the meaning of this, Loki?” He said with a grand gesture. “I don’t have time for tricks. Laufey has found a way to attack Asgard without the Bifrost, Thor is on Midgard, the Warriors Three gone, Sif gone. You can’t throw around accusations. You can’t threaten ME! You have to act like the second prince and go to calm the Jotnar.” Odin was obviously furious.

“Consider this my last trick in Asgard, Odin.” Loki clasped his hands behind his back. It was his go-to gesture when he didn’t want others to know he was feeling defensive. “I refuse to be the puppet king of Jotunheim and you won’t let me be anything else. My departure is simply the best outcome for everyone. If you want to apologize to me, now is the moment. If not, I suggest you let me go before my rage is the only thing left to trust.”

“You are my son!” Odin bellowed. “I raised you with Thor in the hopes of making a proper Aesir out of you instead of a beast! You can’t throw away those efforts! We have had to empty and lock out the vault. This is the reason you were born, Loki, you can’t be a rascal when Asgard needs you. They are your race, you have to solve the problems they create.”

Loki’s glare turned colder than ever, maybe cold enough to empathize to some extent with _his race_. “I wasn’t born to be Asgard’s sycophant. Amusingly enough, neither was Thor.” Loki felt anger rising up his spine. “You can choose to apologize to me, and to Thor, for a lifetime of lies, and welcome us as something more than tools, or you can see us leave.”

“I did what was necessary.” Despite his own words, Odin turned and left the room.

Loki breathed in and out, relaxing slowly and sitting in one of the luxurious but uncomfortable couches. The human relaxed too and walked around the space, inspecting everything and almost-touching whatever he reached. A moment later, when Loki was breathing evenly again, he caught Banner looking at him.

“Should I be worried? That was quite a speech,” Banner had a constant inner turmoil. Loki could see that he always looked tranquil, but he never was; it was evident.

“The room is locked;” Loki explained. “Not much difference with a cell if you want to be worried about that.”

“Are you really talking to me again?” Banner smiled.

“I didn’t want Odin to know that I was preparing to leave.” Loki sniggered softly. “Right now he is probably in his way to destroy my chambers and seeking something to blackmail me with.”

“But your _chambers_ are empty, you have alerted everyone you know, and you have freed your dear pets, so no blackmail. I guess you have a plan for you to escape from here.”

Loki studied him. “The Widow won’t be inclined to give me my soul back if I were to abandon you, the plan is for two.”

“I’m more worried about knowing when I’m needed.” Banner sat next to Loki and made a face of pain when his backside touched the hard surface.

There was a big window before them, so Loki entertained himself watching out of it and wondering if it would be the last time he saw Asgard. He was leaving the realm, after all. He wouldn’t stay in a place that no longer had his loyalty. He would go, probably to Midgard. Thor was right, it was the realm that had less leashes tied to Odin. Loki looked at Banner; humans would be interesting enough for a century or two, or maybe he could visit Jotunheim and make some noise. Which reminded him...

“Why were you in the verge of laughter before?”

Banner looked at Loki, tearing his enraptured eyes from the window.

“Oh, because you remind me of a posh version of Tony. I’m sure he would have clapped and everything. And, what are we waiting for?”

Loki stood up. “Frigga. She might not come; now she must be able to predict our futures, she doesn’t need my report, but...” Loki hoped. Loki’s concept of family had crashed to the ground, but maybe Frigga remained.

A soft knock followed by the door opening warmed up his hope; Frigga walked long steps until she could embrace Loki.

“Loki, my child. What is going on? This isn't like you,” she muttered against his hair.

“Thor has tied himself to Midgard, he is endangering himself and humans alike.”

“Now, my child, Thor wouldn't do that. There must be another reason.” Frigga pushed Loki to look directly into his eyes, and Loki had to remind himself that, even if Frigga was his mother, she was blind to many things. She had lived in denial for a long time, surviving by Odin’s side and with a strong determination. Loki loved her, but he still needed to lie.

“Yes, mother, he wouldn’t. But if Thor is to ever come back, Midgard must be protected.”

“I don't see why Thor would want that.” She frowned; Loki needed something that Frigga would want to protect, a major lie.

“He has fallen in love, mother.”

“Oh. You know her?” The way her features turned interested told Loki everything he needed to know.

“Mother, she is human, fragile, and she holds Thor's heart. She, and her world, must remain out of everyone's knowledge, even Odin’s.” Loki gestured to the window to imply that all of Asgard should be fooled. “I have already done my best. Humans must be seen as insignificant. Not worth the effort of raiding them; a barren land. You have to make everyone believe that Thor is in a terrible place.”

“Isn't she mortal? We can wait.”

Loki blinked. Of course, Friga had not lived with humans, she saw them as endearing little creatures. The realization made Loki notice how much his respect towards humans had grown in the last days. Still, he couldn’t explain to Frigga the heartbreak of _waiting for her to die._ He needed another point of view that would quickly get her to their side.

“She is mortal, but even if you wait until she dies, she could produce an heir and Asgard would be in trouble if the half human has a weak spot as easy to exploit as Midgard.” Loki watched Frigga thinking of a solution, so he needed to propose one that didn’t involve killing or making the human infertile. “We must give them time to become strong, they are already on their way”.

“You should bring your concerns to Odin,” she said calmly.

Loki was anguished by her suggestion, but it also highlighted something that Loki had overlooked all those years. Odin’s decisions were final whereas Frigga needed to consult most of hers. Thinking that Frigga might have lived her life prisoner of her husband, limited by the love she was supposed to profess to him, made Loki nauseous. He still needed an answer that she would believe.

“He will kill the human, mother. He will break Thor's heart to keep Asgard safe.”

 She nodded, as if his words were familiar. Loki didn’t want to know what she was remembering. In the end she accepted to keep the lie going and her attention finally fell on the human standing stiffly by the window.

“Who is your companion?” Frigga said in a tone that didn’t leave room to guess what _she_ thought Banner was.

“Right now I’m supposed to be a bodyguard, ma’am, but it looks like tourist fits somewhat better.”

“A bodyguard?” She looked at Loki questioning.

“Mother, don’t underestimate humans, I’ve done it too many times already,” Loki sighed.

 The conversation turned more amicable, but no less full of lies. Banner was good at lying, he was so charming and knew how to use silences. He was a good partner to keep around. Loki had started to understand why Stark praised him so much. By the time Frigga had to leave, she was fully convinced and much more aware of the complexity of humans.

Loki walked right to the window and looked down, wondering if the white lies to his mother were more or less tiring than the truths told to Odin. It was quite even. Banner looked down too, and patting himself, he realized that he had his mobile with him, so he took a picture of the scenery and of the room because “Tony will kill me if I don’t.”

Loki smiled weakly. “I don’t think you are Lust either.”

“You too with Natasha?” Banner said in a condescending tone that should have angered Loki more.

“Sadly.”

“I was expecting aliens would be taught less prejudice.” The human sat on the couch, but it was for nothing. The backrest was too short and it jabbed the ribs no matter the position.

“You have already been here for more than a minute; your expectations are too kind. But am I wrong in assuming you are Wrath?” Loki looked at the man intently. He simply smiled and shrugged.

“What are we waiting for now?” he said after a few minutes.

“I'm giving Odin time to realize his mistake. He has been my father in my eyes for a long time, I'm waiting for a signal. I want to think that something will change, I want to understand.”

“Let's talk while we wait.”

“You don't mind waiting? It is not part of the mission.” His answer wouldn’t change the wait, because Loki wanted to do this, but he wanted to know.

“I know a thing or two about parents and expectations. Your mother, actually… Nevermind. Congratulations are in order, right? From what I saw, Earth is not only already saved, but completely out of their minds.”

“Ah, yes. I didn't expect having to use Lady Jane, but Frigga is... Complicated.”

Loki had a strange feeling with Banner. He was inquisitive, but not intrusive. Banner entered into a room and even if he explored it, he had a small space of his own. Stark explored a room and took possession of it as much as possible. The same happened with conversations: Banner was easy to forget while Stark had a way of making himself at home and invading one’s thoughts like- like right now.

“Let me ask you a question, Banner,” Loki said to rein in his wandering thoughts.

“I was expecting nothing less from someone like you.” He smiled. “Ask.”

“How does a group of fiends decide to become heroes?” Loki didn’t miss the cringe. “ _Fiends_ makes you flinch? Isn’t it what you are? What else would you have me call you? Just sins?”

“Our names. Humans, maybe. Avengers, if you must. Anyway, I don’t see the problem with being both, not when the ‘sins’ we are charged with are but some human traits.”

“Wrath isn’t a very hero-like trait; merely a brutish solution.”

“It is, when my wrath is justified. I use _brutish solutions_ , sometimes, but I’m more frequently the one instigating the feeling; like you did back there. We are alike, you and I.”

“You instigate wrath?”

“I do. Jarvis, show him.”

The “Yes, sir” came from Banner’s phone, but also from Loki’s. Their attention was momentarily diverted when Loki found that Jarvis was in his phone too.

“Tony gives Jarvis access to most of his devices. He also puts a small version of Jarvis in the mobiles of everyone he cares about.” Banner grinned with the explanation.

“You are not being subtle at all.” Loki pocketed the phone again with a sigh.

“I’m not trying to be. I’m hoping to end my friend’s moping around by being as annoying as I’m capable of being.”

“So, like Stark.” Loki raised an eyebrow, willing to play taunting.

“I aim better,” he responded with one of those kind smiles. “As I was saying, it is the way I fight.”

“But the green berserker…”

“He is not the main trait of my personality, and I try to keep him under control. No, my gift is with making others angry.”

“In Sir’s words, our Bruce is a real troublemaker.” The AI smoothly brought Loki’s attention back to the screen and he showed pictures of Banner in podiums, at conferences, in the news…

“We receive death threats daily, Jarvis selects them by the number of expletives. Energy companies hate me because every time I give a conference, they lose clients.”

“You create discomfort” Loki summarized.

“I do what I can. And even though I don’t think you have fracking in Asgard, your anger resonates familiar; that’s another reason why I found your speech so captivating. You have it in you. Ire gives shape to your actions, but you trick and talk instead of striking.” Banner pinched the bridge of his nose. “Don’t tell Tony, but he was right.”

“Huh?”

“We all knew that you’d make a good test for Thor. But Tony knew more than us from the moment you walked in the first day. He has been saying you could be any of us, that you are good at manipulation and resourceful when you put your mind into it. Much like Natasha and Tony have expanded their limits. It’s a pity that Natasha decided that it was her tool to use, I don’t think that’s what Tony meant.”

“Desperate times; she is a strategist.” Loki turned the idea in his mind. “What surprises me is that I never saw how you were using me. Now I see that is the reason I could pass all those tests. It is not that I am virtuous as seen through human eyes, I’m still worthless. I would have failed if you took me seriously.”

“No.” Banner frowned and crossed his arms. “We used you because we don’t trust Thor.”

“You surely jest?” Loki sat by Banner with a perplexed expression.

“He is too… young; impulsive. We wanted to see his reactions with someone like you around. Someone persuasive, persistent, and directly linked to him.”

“And he has resisted,” Loki said, still not understanding.

“Resisting isn’t the goal. Resisting is just a show of how stubborn he is. He is supposed to represent Pride. Has he made you feel any pride at all in the last few days? Following him fills you with satisfaction?”

Loki didn’t answer, but only because it was too obvious.

“That is exactly what concerns us. He isn’t ready; Coulson must have made a mistake. But that wasn’t what I wanted to say, about you. We don’t measure souls, we only make people feel. It is… I don’t know, Tony has studied it, it is a neuronal draw. Giving in or not is not a matter of worth, and you are not worthless. It is a pattern of thoughts, sometimes it looks more Buddhist than Christian, but I guess sin is in the eye of the beholder too.”

“I’m curious about that, Banner.”

Banner smiled. “Curiosity is a strong feeling too, you know, Loki? I don’t think you have noticed that yet.” He sighed “but please call me Bruce if we are going to discuss spiritual beliefs. A doctor’s reputation wouldn’t withstand including religion in what we do.”

“Bruce,” Loki conceded. “are you human?”

“I hope so! I try to stay human every day,” Bruce hid behind humor.

“You wouldn’t be human if you stopped trying?” Loki asked confused.

Bruce sighed. “We were all peculiar humans before Coulson and Janet found us.”

“Are they? Humans?”

“Yes, maybe more than I.”

“If you represent the capital sins, is Coulson that Devil I keep hearing about?”

“…no. I don’t think he is.” Bruce scratched behind his ear. “It is a very long story that involves the astral plane, Mephistopheles, someone selling his soul three times and, for some reason, hell being handed to Coulson. He hasn’t told the same lie twice about what really happened, so that’s all we know.”

“But he is some manner of king in hell,” Loki insisted.

“Pepper says that Coulson is the CEO of hell, Tony says he is the manager of a parallel dimension. Phil says he only repurposes resources.”

“And the Avengers don’t come from that… dimension?”

“No, we’ve never even visited. Avengers were already an initiative in progress, but Janet and Phil decided that both things worked well together. Fury didn’t agree, there were words, and that’s why you have not met either Shield or Fury. Anyway, one of the things from hell worked when Coulson asked Tony for help to figure it out: the names were there, or that is how they explain it, I wasn’t in yet. The cynosure is convoluted and it has resisted our attempts to give it an explanation.”

“What do you know so far?”

“Tony’s hypothesis is a global neuronal network. I am not so sure. I know we are not the same as before we came into contact with it. Sometimes I fear it changed us, sometimes I’m glad it did, but maybe coming together made us different instead. I don’t think we know enough to form even a hypothesis.”

Loki was silently thinking, there weren’t many possibilities if he applied his studies on seidr and the Odinforce.

“Oh, no. I’ve seen that same look in a different face before.” Banner leaned forward. “Come out with your theory.”

Loki only doubted a second. “I thought demons were parasites or leeches, but you are not. You are focal points of that other dimension, demons, if that is the name you give to creatures hailing from that dimension. From your explanation, that _hell_ was a copy of your world with a closer astral plane. The veil between dimensions broke, and someone, that Mephistopheles, handed over the ruling of a sinking ship.

“The dimension is fighting to keep existing, and its astral plane, acting as a living thing, tries to replicate your world to keep on living. That device that showed your names probably was only keeping a record of the last similarities that were keeping the worlds parallel. You thought it meant something more. You are only sins because of what you thought about that hell and about yourselves.

“Now you belong to both sides, because you have been using it, but you are young: young demons, shadows of the other side subsisting in the link. The magic comes from that other astral plane and all your temptations, your invented sins, everything is a direct link to the other side, a power coming from an alignment. Even small configurations hold some power.”

Bruce considered it deeply.

“I guess it makes sense, but I need to understand what is an astral plane and all the other terminology. The self-perception theory also explains why Tony and Natasha have expanded what they can do. And maybe…”

“Yes? I have already overshared; would you hide things from me now?” Loki teased, having forgotten that they were technically still trapped in a luxurious chamber.

“I’m considering that we may have adopted the sins we have been accused of. Or maybe the things that make us feel guilty. Tony and Natasha, they always have… they always think…”

“They torment themselves more than the rest of you and they use their pain as a weapon.” Loki was getting used to finding similarities with the humans. “I can’t imagine what impact you are having in the other dimension.” Loki wanted more opinions about his theory. “Stark should hear about this.”

Bruce stayed quiet for a few seconds. “Do me a favor. When you tell Tony, omit the part where you told me first. He has been pouting enough lately.”

“Why are you being so sincere?” Loki wondered aloud.

“Because you don’t have a soul to bargain with, and nobody will mind much if I tell the truth now that we are so close to the end. What do you want to do when we are done here?”

“What I want doesn't matter.” Loki answered automatically. “Everyone needs Thor to be in Asgard. For the fight, for Midgard's safety... Still, I want to take him away from you because he has been lied to as much as I, and we are damaged in different ways by the same hand. That makes us brothers more than blood could. I don’t have much left, but I have him.”

“You have New York if you ask.”

“You mean, taking Thor’s place?” Loki frowned.

“I mean as someone who has lost the one place where he fit and wants an understanding ear. You will learn that stories like that are hardly uncommon if you stay in the tower.”

Loki’s mind immediately flew to spending more time exploring magic with Stark. He had to consider all the other humans or part-humans too, but the daydream had Stark as the main focus. Loki tried to tell himself that the only reason why Stark came to mind was because of the human’s persistent and insidious behavior. Furthermore, living close to that annoying jester would be a test to his nerves, a nightmare. That was it.

“I’m not alone,” Loki felt the need to explain. “My fall from grace is not enough to erase debts of gratitude that I’ve been hoarding. I would be welcome, however grudgingly, in many places.”

“Still, think about it. There is only a letter from fiend to friend.” Loki stared. “No? One day I’ll leave humor to Clint and Tony once and for good.”

They stayed between conversations and silences for a long time, then a noise from the street told Loki it was time to leave, if only to eavesdrop. Loki took Bruce with him to one of the balconies from where Odin could be seen, and heard, giving a heartfelt speech. The noise of the crowd below was what had clued them in.

"Loki, my son, has been killed by our enemies and an impostor has come in his place, thinking we wouldn't recognize his dirty stratagem."

Banner was surprised, Loki not so much. The rage of the Asgardians was palpable; that was what surprised Loki the most. Bruce wanted an explanation; Loki had one, although he suspected the question was rhetorical.

"If he lets me go, I am a living threat to his reign. But do not dwell in it, let's leave, before he finishes and guards make me the first fallen of this war."


	11. Quiet Night

It was silent and dark when the Bifrost touched the balcony of the tower later that night, after a stroll through the hidden paths. The streets below were still awake, but from so far above, it looked like an illusion. It wasn't long before Jarvis lit the balcony and the living room for them.

"Sirs, welcome back. The Avengers have been notified of your presence."

Bruce and Loki came in and sat on the couches, in distant spots. Loki had lost the small advantage of being in a familiar place and Bruce was once again an enemy instead of a tentative friend.

"Miss Romanoff says that she won't lose another night of sleep for this and suggests you go to bed before she gets up and puts you to sleep herself."

Bruce chuckled. "I doubt she was that polite in her phrasing."

"I avoid swearing in any language," Jarvis answered truthfully "least someone decides to do what was done to Watson in the IBM."

"Go Hall on them if they touch your mainframe, Jarvis. I know you can." Stark came into the room freshly awaken, smelling of fire, and wearing yoga pants and not much more. Loki wondered if the garments meant that he had been sparring, sleeping, or if his t-shirt had caught fire.

“Tony. Don't even think about quizzing me. I'm going to sleep.” Bruce walked to a hall, ignoring Stark completely.

“But, dear, darling, dearest: Alien world!” Stark followed pleadingly.

“Hulk smashed it,” Bruce said to cut short the conversation. “There was nothing to see anyway.” Bruce crossed a threshold that seemed to be Stark's limit.

“Liar, liar, pants _are_ actually on you so, no Hulk was involved,” Stark shouted down the hall.

 _“Good night_ Tony,” came the answer from already far away.

Stark turned to Loki with only a hint of mischief, but he didn't approach him yet. He sat on a nearby table that was not designed to sit on, and watched Loki squirm. Loki, who had wanted to explain all his theories to the human, and had explained them already to a different human, found that his silvertongue could be made of actual silver for all it worked.

“You can activate the magic barrier again,” was the only thing that came out of his mouth. It sounded far more secure than Loki felt. And far, far more professional and cold than Loki had intended.

Stark was not buying the tone, but he made a gesture to Jarvis and Loki felt his magic limited again. They stared at each other, both measuring what could be said as opposed to what they wanted to say. Loki blinked first and sat comfortably on a couch like he owned it (a couch that was built with actual comfort in mind), making it look like he was in control of the situation.

"I have found it easier to talk with you all without the weight of a soul to trade. You seem to be the exception." Loki let the comment hang, Stark was still smirking, but maybe it was another way of looking in control.

"And do you know why, or should I guess?" he said impishly.

"No guessing needed."

Stark stood and walked to Loki, moving an armchair until it was right in front of the spot where Loki was sitting on the couch; so close that when Stark sat down and leaned forward, their knees fit like cogwheels. It should have been ridiculous considering how big the living room was. However, it didn’t appear ridiculous now that tricks were coming to an end, lies expiring. It didn’t feel ridiculous because Bruce had shredded new light to all of Stark’s previous actions; the word wasn’t _ridiculous_ , but _intimate_.

It didn’t mean that Loki was any less confused, though, because if Bruce was Wrath, and the Widow was Jealousy, Stark could only be Lust. Therefore, Loki didn’t know where Lust games ended and truth began. He wanted to think that Stark held more interest in him than a mere toy, but he couldn’t allow himself the luxury of hoping.

“Hey, Kitten, you are worse conversation than Bruce tonight, and I still don’t know a word about Asgard, except that it seems to be tiring.”

“Not as tiring as you.” Loki propped up his head on the tip of his fingers and his arm on the armrest, feigning nonchalance.

“I’ll have you know that I’m riveting company when my public isn’t half-asleep on the couch. You know I have empty guest rooms, don’t you?”

“I’m not sure I trust what Lust might think a guest room should contain,” Loki joked.

Unexpectedly, Loki caught a flash of hurt in Stark’s face. Loki had hurt him before in his short stay, but now it hurt back because he hadn’t _meant_ to hurt. What was going through Stark’s mind to react like that?

“I said room, Kitten, I have dungeons for that, though you are invited to those too, of course.” He waggled his eyebrows, but somehow it sounded false.

Loki thought about the magazines, the fame of playboy, that insignificant article about how Stark was incapable of keeping a meaningful relationship. It wasn’t hard to compare it with his own imposed fame of lie-smith, and he compared it to what Bruce had said about Stark. Loki knew why Stark could be upset if someone assumed the worst of him.

“I’ve been told that you grew your magic out of the limits of Lust, though.”

“You have been talking magic with Bruce!” Stark pouted and whined in jest, Loki saw the defensiveness in his childish humor.

Stark wanted him to play along and ease that fake jealousy with some kind of promise or reassurance; a well rehearsed speech to make the conversation numb, but it wouldn’t happen. Loki didn’t like either scripts, nor Stark being defensive.

“I have a theory about your magic, but I don’t know if I am inclined to share it.” Loki accompanied his statement with the kind of mischievous smile that made servants hide fragile things when he was younger.

Stark’s eyes brightened up and a real smile to match Loki’s started to blossom in his face. Loki caught himself thinking that it was beautiful. He outright refused to think that he wanted to put it there again, but by the time he finished that thought, it was too late.

“Is there something I can do to _incline_ you to share?”

Loki thought that all Stark had to do was to be a little persuasive and Loki would give him more than enough, but there were many things holding Loki back. Stark was a human, just to start, Asgard would never approve of a human, much less a male one. It was bad enough that Thor was on his way to know that human woman intimately. And that was also a factor: Loki didn’t want to follow his brother’s steps ever again.

Then he had the other side of the spell. Stark could simply be playing with him, due to his nature, of maybe it was a despicable crave, an itch because Loki was alien. Possibly neither were true, or Stark would have already proposed to Thor and he’d have a black eye for asking such a disgraceful question.

To top it off, Loki wasn’t the Asgardian he had thought he was; that was important for Loki. He couldn’t think of being appealing to others when he was appalled of himself.

“There is nothing you can do to incline me,” _Much as I’d like,_ Loki ended to himself.

“I’m sure there must be something! I’m wealthy, just ask.” Stark insisted with a grin. Then he continued with his smile diminishing, although nobody would have noticed if they weren’t paying as much attention as Loki. “A guy like you, who is arguably as smart as me, must have already noticed that there is not a working deal right now.”

“I am perfectly aware, but I still don’t know if it is your intention to see my way to perdition, or if maybe it is so ingrained in you that you can’t help it. So I won’t indulge.” _Much as I’d like_ Loki’s mind supplied again without permission.

“Indulge in something else, like, labtime?”

“Your lab? Ugh!” Loki stood up and looked around their trapped legs to see if there was a way out that didn’t involve any kind of friction with Stark. He knew he was going to give in and accept one of his offers if he didn’t stop himself, consequences be damned. “You have scanned _my brother’s hammer_ there, I wouldn’t accept that offer even if it was sincere,” Loki said playfully. Without the widow’s spell clouding him, it was easy to dispel the jealousy, and he didn’t really want to hurt Stark.

“You are sending mixed signals here, Kitten.”

“I’m really not.” Loki kept his tone light. It was perfectly possible that Stark could read his want, but Loki wouldn’t admit it. “What, exactly, do you think I am _sending,_ to avoid it next time?”

Stark stood up and it put them at mere inches of distance, if also at different heights. “You are not putting any distance between us, for example.”

Loki waited and minded the speed of his breathing to give nothing away. Had Loki thought that Stark’s smile was beautiful? Because he had seriously underestimated, and by some means overlooked, his intense brown eyes; his serious expression was disturbingly open. Openness was so rare in people who approached Loki that it was much more charming than any lascivious look.

Loki pushed Stark slightly, without lingering on his chest -too much- and huffed a scornful laugh.

“I’m going to accept that guest room you offered so graciously, and I’m going to use it alone.”

Loki moved to walk away and Stark gripped his wrist to make him turn.

“I’m not trying to use you, or harm you.”

Loki looked at his wrist with Stark’s fingers around it, below the bracelets, not trapped, just held. Looking there had the advantage of not looking into Stark’s eyes.

“In these circumstances, it hardly matters. You would use the same words if you had opposite intentions.”

Loki gained courage to look into the human’s mesmerizing eyes, and convey his seriousness. The eyes quickly changed from some some vague form of melancholy; they gained again that impish quality to them. It made Loki sure that Stark had gotten the message and was back to playing.

“You are still mine.” But he let go of Loki’s wrist.

“You wish!” Loki responded immediately, letting Stark take them away from the deep-sounding conversation and to light-hearted banter. It was far more comfortable.

“I don’t wish, I know!”

Loki left him alone, muttering profanities about the arrogant, insufferable and handsome devil that was Stark. Fortunately Jarvis gave him directions to an empty bedroom, because in his haste to leave, he had forgotten to ask for directions. Loki simply couldn’t go back to Stark and ask, it would have been too much.

As he finally rested after a most foul day, Loki couldn’t stop thinking. He found it loathsome, how he had his soul tied to a human. But even worse was the strange comfort that the brand brought him. It was as bad as being in thrall, and still there was something different that he couldn’t pinpoint. It felt freeing more than shackling.

However interesting his day had been, there was one thing that occupied most of his somnolent thoughts. He didn’t understand why a mortal succeeded where so many Asgardians had failed. Loki didn’t see the maidens of the court appealing, the warriors were dull, the advisors were plain, the smiths, the bakers, the artists… all were dreary in the end. Very few people had managed to get Loki’s attention, even if he found them beautiful.

There had been a couple of elves, maybe one Asgardian, but it was an uncommon occurrence that Loki found someone personally attractive. Still, even if he didn’t understand why, he felt pleasantly warm when sleep finally quieted his mind.


	12. Calm Before the Final Storm

Loki didn’t mind imposing on his hosts; he had a comfortable bed, a good enough bathroom with warm water, and no reason to rush (especially after the Widow refused to wake for him the previous night). It meant that by the time he came out of the guest room, it was still early, but Rogers had already left his daily bag of goods. The only ones who remained having breakfast around a table were the Widow, Bruce, Potts, and the balding man who should be dead and who meant so much to the archer, Coulson.

Bruce used a foot to push one of the empty chairs in invitation and Loki took it.

“From the right side of the corridor; Jarvis was telling the truth,” the Widow said in place of a greeting.

“I feel offended at the implications,” Jarvis answered while the rest of the table nodded welcoming and Loki picked a sweet from the central plate. He wouldn’t have stayed so comfortably, but Bruce had actually made it into the small group of people that Loki was glad of seeing.

“You can lie without the hindrance of facial cues; I’d say it is a compliment, Jarvis.”

“I’ll strive to take it as one, Miss Romanoff.”

“Atta boy.”

“Morning, Loki, so you decided to stay, after all?” Potts asked politely.

“Out of convenience.”

The silence that followed hid a sarcastic ‘yes, sure’ from some of the attendants, but it was dutifully ignored. Coulson was uneasy, Loki recognized the face of a diplomat who was waiting patiently and placidly, and was running out of one of those two.

“Bruce has been telling us bits about Asgard, but I think he was waiting for you.” It looked like placidity had won over patience.

Loki was reminded of Frigga's small chats with ladies and lords from every place in the gardens. Those looked innocent enough, and Odin avoided them like it would tarnish his reputation, but Loki had seen some of the best diplomatic tactics used over a frilly tablecloth and sweet drinks.

“Your world is safe for now.” Except there was a human breakfast before them, instead of Frigga’s usual choice of drinks.

Loki caught a complicit look from the Widow to Potts. Maybe the Widow hadn’t had the approval of all the Avengers, but she definitely had the approval of one. They two seemed to relax after Loki’s short address, Coulson requested more. Loki still directed his answers to the Widow; it was she who had tricked Loki, and that deserved some respect.

“Odin has a war to fight. Asgard thinks that Thor is fulfilling his punishment. Midgard is irrelevant again. In addition, Frigga thinks that Thor has found love here and that Midgard should be hidden and protected until it can stand on its own in case an heir is coming.”

Loki could spin a beautiful tale, but part of being a wordsmith was knowing the audience and adapting to it. His audience in that moment wanted results, not stories or epic recounts. Bruce didn’t let it be, though.

“You are going to omit that you implied Jane is Thor’s fiancé? That you painted yourself as a menace by taking credit for our blip on their radar? How about the part where your father told Asgard that you are dead and to be hunted down upon sight? No? How about telling us how you _expected_ this and prepared beforehand?”

Surprisingly, Bruce didn’t seem to be saying it to put any blame on Loki. He was looking at the Widow like he held her responsible for that outcome.

“That isn’t relevant.” Loki didn’t let Bruce continue. If all tricks were revealed, surely someone would accuse him of not doing his mission right. 

“Bruce, did he do what he had to do?” the Widow asked.

“Exceeding expectations! We won’t even need to negotiate for some time, but the consequences-”

“Good enough. He can have his soul back.”

Loki overheard the _no, not good enough_ and something about ethics, but he felt the mark of the Widow leaving, numbing the conversation and making him feel empty. He should be glad of having his freedom back, but he had finally understood why the mark wasn’t caging them: it gave him a purpose.

From the moment Loki had started to drift away from the house of Odin, from the moment he had _known,_ he had lacked motivation. The mark and the mission had a calming effect on him because it meant he belonged somewhere again. Loki would need to replace that soon; he wasn’t made to meander aimlessly. There had to be a goal worth achieving.

“Am I late?”

The voice cut straight through his thoughts and straight through the current conversation too. Stark had that kind of charm that made everyone in the room look at him. Maybe in annoyance, but he still claimed the stage wherever he went.

“You actually got out of bed?” Potts looked at her mobile. “And it’s not even noon yet.”

“You confuse me with Clint. I wake up early usually.”

“What you do is never going to sleep in the first place, but you went to sleep last night; I think the lab was empty this morning, so you _have_ risen up early.” Bruce taunted further.

“Why do you think so?” Stark said, finding an empty chair next to Loki.

“No explosions.”

“Hands; no grease.”

“Sheet marks still on your face.”

The three simultaneous answers were followed by Stark hiding his face in the crook of his arm, in an overdramatic fashion, shouting ‘don’t look’. Then he leaned his elbows on the table and looked past Loki at Bruce.

 “Bruce. Asgard, I want a complete guide. Technology, Science!”

Loki remembered the things he had smuggled for the study of radiation and he interrupted Stark by summoning the parcels, bottles and bags, and giving Bruce the proper instructions to avoid unnecessary toxic fumes. It prompted a childish complaint from Stark, who wanted gifts too, and it continued debating if having Loki back was gift enough.

Rogers, Thor, and the archer joined them at a later time, when the breakfast plates had been taken back to the kitchen. The discussion evolved into something more serious, debating the Widow (Natasha, since they had asked collectively to be called by their first names) and her sudden change of plans.

Thor was very quiet and he sent distrustful glares at Loki every few minutes; especially when the group asked Loki punctual questions that drew attention to him. The glare was the most uncomfortable interaction at the table, but soon that changed when Coulson, Phil, repeated the question that Bruce had formulated the previous day.

“What now?”

Eight pairs of eyes were suddenly on Loki.

“I won’t let two of the opportunities that you granted me go to waste.”

If someone was going to say something, Bruce beat them to it with a quick exclamation. “Fight me.”

Loki only looked surprised for one second, then he smiled with something akin to affection and answered calmly.

“No.”

“Oh, no, what shall I do.” Bruce deadpanned, almost bored. “You defeated me at my game.”

“A most glorious fight of wits it was,” Loki said without a hint of humility and all the drama that Thor used to boast about his hunts.

Loki noticed that Bruce was looking at Loki’s left and searched a reflection to see why. Bruce continued his depthless theatrics. “I have no idea what could have gone wrong.”

“You, my fiend, are just a human against the might of a… god.” The last word almost got clogged in his throat. In the reflection on the screen in the other room, Loki saw himself and the rest of the picture, with Stark openly staring at Loki. It wasn’t the predatory look that he saw when he faced Stark, it was tender and it looked fragile, even in the filmy reflection of the screen.

“What is this mockery of a trial?!” Thor bellowed.

Loki looked directly at Stark, but the human’s face was already a mask of aloof amusement at Thor’s expense.

“Loki and I had time to discuss yesterday. I won’t own his anger, so there isn’t a reason to wear each other down for nothing.”

Loki nodded; it was quite enjoyable having someone who at least seemed to be on his side without further intentions.

 “Fine, but there is nothing Loki can say to make me leave. You have invoked ghosts of war, of friendship, of family, but all of that belongs to a life I no longer want.” Thor stood and crossed his arms.

“I have seen you no longer have space in your heart for those who still love you through hardships, but I have hope you see that Asgard’s predicament is your responsibility.”

“How could it be? I refuse to be the prince.”

“Even in your refusal, it is still a fact: you caused that war, you will be responsible for their deaths. Your past deeds always come back distorted into something bigger and worse when you ignore them. War is your deed; your real enemy.”

“You pushed me to go to Jotunheim!” Thor’s hands slammed on the table.

Loki stood too, but he didn’t raise his voice. “I only said you were right in worrying, I also said we could do nothing to defy father, but you only listen the counsel that parrots your ideas mindlessly.”

“You weren’t against it! You came with me!”

“As is my duty as the second prince! Who was also urging us back the whole time we were there! Not you!” Loki realized he was getting into a fruitless argument again.

“Princes don’t back down, and we wouldn't have been there in the first place if not for you!”

Loki bit his tongue. More. Loki needed more reasons. Loki wanted to keep his memories, wanted to fight for his stupid, stupid brother. He needed to use what he had seen in Asgard, Thor should be nostalgic for some of that.

“The Warriors Three have abandoned Asgard in favor of looking for you, Sif too. They are in Midgard.”

“Excuse me;” Phil interrupted fiddling with a pad-device. “We have been investigating four strangers that may fit.” Coulson showed four lonesome figures that the brothers recognized. “We will have to talk about them later, if you don’t mind.”

Thor nodded briefly and turned back to Loki. “They will desist and go back, in time. It is their duty. “

“Just like being a prince is yours?” Loki remarked.

“I'll tell them to go back.”

“With what authority? Choose; either you are a prince or you aren't.”

“They will obey because they are friends.”

“Are they? And you'd still let them go alone to a war you caused? You’d forget them selfishly to live in Midgard?”

“The frost giants brought this upon themselves for their crimes,” Thor persisted with a change of topic.

“What crime? The terrible crime of calling you a princess?! Because _that_ was the forlorn detonant. ” Loki took a calming breath. “The ones who ruined your coronation died, no Asgardian was harmed in their incursion, only your pride. How fitting.” Loki spat, almost giving up.

“Thor, I have seen Asgard preparing for war. It will be terrible. Someone should stop them before it starts.” Bruce helped Loki unexpectedly. “And I have seen your mother; she wants you to be happy; she has great hopes of seeing you again.”

Thor waited a second; Bruce had a different effect on him. For some reason, the same words coming from Loki would have been grating. 

“You know not of what you speak, friend. Jotuns are conceited savages who seek destruction and Asgard can annihilate them without suffering a great loss.”

“Thor. Would you repeat this conversation word for word to Jane? Without feeling ashamed at all?” Natasha added. Loki wished the humans had remained quiet, now Thor was too far from reason, feeling cornered.

“I would!” The whole room knew that Thor was lying to himself, but his stubbornness and pride wouldn’t let him see that. “In fact, I will tell her right now, and I must speak with you, Son of Coul, for someone must tell the Warriors Three and Sif to stop looking for me.”

Thor took the elevator, leaving behind an awkward quietness. Loki rested his elbows on the table and his forehead on his hands. One chance, that was all he had left, and Thor was mired in a bog of his own thoughts. Loki couldn’t help him out if he didn’t want to be helped.

An arm wrapped around his shoulders from his left. Loki looked suspiciously at Stark from the corner of his eye. The man sent back a look of his own like he couldn’t believe Loki would suspect of him in a moment like that. Loki almost rolled his eyes because at his weakest was the perfect moment to act and every trickster knew that, but he noticed that the silence had persisted. Not one chair had been pushed. He looked up.

Bruce had a sympathetic expression and the others wore similar faces mixed with curiosity and in the archer’s case, a deep, ill-concealed discomfort. Even Phil, who had a neutral face to rival Natasha’s, was showing worry. It was disconcerting, because nobody had gone running to please Thor and Loki didn’t mind their presence much, even weak as he was.

“He has been making progress since we put Dr. Foster in his way,” Phil announced to dissipate the tension. “But it isn’t enough, and all seems to disappear where Loki is concerned.”

“In his eyes, I represent everything he wants to leave behind. I can’t be the one to convince him, I will fail tomorrow,” Loki explained.

“You need a shock. You need to make him react.” Steve said.

“I already shocked him, told him every possible reason, but it didn't work.”

“Now I feel bad for the bastard.” The archer grumbled.

“Can we change the terms of the dare at least?” Natasha directed her question at Stark. “It would be convenient for us if Loki could remember and send someone else.”

“The deal is bomb-proof. I can change it if you want a black-hole in the living room; you think I haven’t been looking for loopholes?”

They debated a few ideas before Virginia and Loki came to the conclusion that his only chance was writing a recount of the last days and hiding it somewhere in his person so he would find the document when he lost his memory. Of course, the first words were to urge Loki to stay away from Asgard.


	13. Science Meets the Fiction

After that, the makeshift assembly dissolved. Virginia stayed long enough to give him pen and papers and Stark and Bruce accompanied him the rest of the day after he saved his precarious memories. They discussed Loki’s theory about the dying dimension and the astral connection over a dish that Bruce had prepared, but Loki didn’t recognize.

 Stark was as excited with their theories as Loki had expected. He argued Bruce’s suggestion of the humans having adopted their ‘sins’ from feeling of guilt, but the topic was avoided instead of discussed, which meant that the inventor just wanted to consider it on his own. The conversation was so engaging that Loki almost forgot for a second the kind of future that awaited him.

Loki knew that he couldn’t convey what he had gained during his time in Midgard in words. He had to choose wisely what to say, because if he said too much, he would later dismiss his own words as some sort of cruel joke. He couldn’t very well explain that he was comfortable and almost familiar with two humans.

He wasn’t a fool; he knew he would lose more than memories, he knew he would go back to the state of confusion and distress in which he had been just before meeting the humans. He knew that they, consciously or not, had had a balmy effect on him. He would drown in chaos once again, instead of using the tides to his advantage.

The humans couldn’t get it out of their heads either, since the obvious silences from time to time were pregnant and pensive. Loki ended the silence bringing up the matter out loud and asking if they could think of any loopholes that could let Loki get away with it. They didn’t have sudden miracles for him and melancholy reached a peak after dinner time.

Their best idea was to gain some time by leaving the deal hanging over Loki’s head for a few days, but they didn’t know if the spellwork would react adversely to that and consider that Loki was giving up. All in all, Loki had started to think he was fighting a losing battle. Everything was said and done: come morning, he would prevail against Stark and fail against Thor. He was going to forget.

Of course, there were other options, but asking for help would take time and persuasion; killing the Avengers would be counterproductive; it was impossible to bribe Thor when he was in a righteous mood. Maybe he could add to his papers that he needed a new deal to recuperate his memories, but there was no way to know if the memories’ would be locked or destroyed. Stark and Bruce didn’t know the answer, since they had never encountered a situation like this before. Loki didn’t want to give up, but there weren’t paths left to explore.

“I see you won't solve anything while I'm here. So I have sudden urgent business to attend, gentlemen. See you tomorrow.”

Loki waved tiredly and Stark followed his friend’s departure with a half-smirk that looked as miserable as Loki’s little wave. Loki only had the time of a breath to think that they shouldn’t waste the night before Stark voiced the same thoughts in a bitter voice.

Stark sat next to him with an ankle artfully crossed over his opposite knee and an arm casually laid on the back of the couch behind Loki. He was a living image of temptation; at odds with his bitter inflection.

“Define waste,” Loki said, playing innocent.

“Looking and not touching right now is pretty wasteful,” Stark said, not bothering to hide a look directed at Loki’s lips. “Then again, not using a new pair of eyes would be a waste too.” Stark leaned closer to Loki, but he stopped before what Loki had expected. “I can do two things from here.”

“Just two?” Loki said to mask his confusion. “I thought you had a reputation.”

Stark smirked, but they were so close that Loki only saw the pull of his cheeks. “Only one of those things has a time limit.” Curiosity made Loki stay quiet. “You see, I don’t give up easily when I want someone that so evidently wants something back. If you forget me, I’m going to stalk your ass.”

Loki laughed and pulled back to see that despite the humorous phrasing, the human was serious.

“I will despise humans again,” Loki summarized the main obstacle.

“And I will prove you wrong again,” Stark said with a confidence that could make Loki believe for a moment. "I have as much time as I can live for that, but I only have tonight to pick up your brains regarding our little dare." Stark chuckled at Loki's surprised face. "Told ya, I'm not the giving up kind."

"What did you have in mind?" Loki asked once he got up to speed.

"Isn't that an educated guess? I have a trick up my sleeve in the place that you renamed before instead of keeping my scientific designation."

"The astral plane"

"Exactly, the neuroactive network. I take you to the manifestation of the deal there and you tell me what do your mage eyes see."

Loki smirked a little, "and for that you need to be nearly in my lap."

"Are you the expert?"

Stark's taunt didn't mean much, but Loki was not an expert of the astral plane, indeed. The size of the astral plane was inversely related to the complexity of the realm. Asgard, like the elven realms, was complex, with spacetime instabilities and a lot of magic keeping them together. Midgard had few exceptions to its absolute truths, it had an unshakeable science, so their astral plane was probably bigger.

Loki didn't have room to create in that plane, so he had only learnt basic knowledge about it. It was enough to realize that Stark didn't need to be sitting nearly on Loki, probably. None of the elves who had taught Loki about it had ever needed more than meditation, then again, neither had they tried to transport someone with them.

The Midgardian still asked Loki to move forward and he made room for himself between Loki and the back of the couch. Stark was sitting on his heels, with a knee on either side of Loki’s hips and the tips of his fingers hovering an inch from Loki’s head.

“Okay, now relax, close your eyes and think of something I can recognize to pull you.”

“Like what?” Loki was already dreading what his mind was going to think first.

Loki closed his eyes, obeying more readily than what was usual in him, and he felt the warmth of Stark's hands when they hovered his.

"Yes, like the hands. No, wait, I lost you. You are slippery! Fine, then think of think of your body pressed against me and every warm spot, think of my breath on your neck when I spe- There you are!"

There was a pull that felt like giving up to sleep if one could sleep during a freefall. Loki didn't have time to feel embarrassed for what Stark had used to put his mind on a single track, because as the disorientation disappeared, he found himself in a big place with complex but intriguing constructions.

"This is Midgard's astral plane?" He asked lightly.

"More or less;" Stark's voice came distorted. "Right now what you see is just the tower."

Loki didn't gape, but it was a very close thing. He told himself it was a matter of logic, of course: with stable physics, the astral plane was spacious and humans occupied it with dreams, ideas... Humans might live lives of ants, but Loki found that they held inner worlds in there.

Loki finally turned to Stark’s presence with a burning curiosity.

It was big and deceptively engulfing but light at the same time; not threatening and it told Loki many things about Stark and his nature. Stark didn't have an avatar like the ones elves used to hide themselves; Loki could see everything as a consequence. Stark didn't have many limits, his mind was scattered and protective, if the way Loki felt firmly held was proof enough.

There were sharp and hard edges, some dulled, some not so much. The composition had shadows and lights, creativity and discipline; many contrasts to explore. Loki could get lost wondering why hurt was so close to joy or how such a short-lived human could collected so many fears and hope at the same time.

"Kitten?"

"Wait, Stark, I'm getting used to this." There was no getting used, he was enjoying the views.

Loki, opposite from Stark, was contained and hidden in his avatar -a simplified version of his body, damaged, whose skin was flickering blue every few seconds- it was for his protection. That had been the first lesson about the astral plane; just before being told that he was learning useless magic. That, and the fact that Loki didn’t have a root in the Midgardian astral plane meant that Loki was very small in comparison with the unbidden entity of Stark.

There wasn’t any protection in the Midgardian’s mind; Stark was unknowingly laying himself bare before Loki, who could use his position and size to destroy all that made Stark. Loki could wreak havoc in that unsuspecting mind; Stark would never know what happened to him. Loki was not an expert, but there was no finesse or art to mindless destruction. The so-called god of chaos basked in an opportunity that he wasn’t going to take, but made him feel powerful.

The reciprocity was intoxicating. Loki had been very exposed to those humans in the last days. Stark’s vulnerability now managed to appease a restless dread that had been present since Thor… since Odin… since Jotunheim.

“Kitten, say something.”

“Stark, you weren’t exactly delicate and gentle, deal with the consequences.”

“You are in one piece, I’ve had worse first times.”

“I was your experiment?”

“You think I bring a lot of guests here?”

Loki should be annoyed, but Stark’s incorporeal presence held him more securely. The gesture had the effect of bringing Loki’s attention to the obvious warmth enveloping him. It was obviously careful and affectionate, because Stark hadn’t learnt to hide. Stark’s spontaneous reactions were on display and quickly erasing any doubt that Loki could have about Stark’s intentions.

Loki took a moment to examine what was exactly holding him. There were silken strings, taut, but not constraining, and only as strong as Loki let them be. Cobweb strings made of ideas, plans, hopes… Loki could touch every single strand and pick imagined futures mixed with memories of the last days. He could only wonder if Stark realized the extent of what Loki could see. Probably not, the reckless idiot.

Loki had never been bestowed with such care, and he had never been so openly cherished. He didn’t know the reason, but he knew that his affection towards the human wasn’t nearly as deep. The difference was relative, though, because Loki didn’t feel disgusted or repelled as was the case with most displays of interest directed at him.

This, he enjoyed. He could see himself letting it grow until it was less tentative. If Loki hadn’t been hiding, there would probably already be strings reaching to Stark, but he couldn’t acknowledge them yet. Time, and their situation, were the only things in their way. Loki was determined to remember this, because he was selfish, and he wanted to remember that time when he had proof of someone’s devotion.

Loki tested the strings and moved around observing their resilience; the thoughts made solid clung to Loki’s image like the wake of a falling star. They thinned when he walked farther: first thin as jewelry, then thin as sound. Loki stayed still to see if Stark would follow, but the thoughts kept thinning until there was a silent snap.

Stark, or a lousy avatar of him, was standing next to Loki a second later. He had his characteristic smirk in place and an arm around Loki’s waist, as if he couldn’t completely let go of him. The avatar wasn’t well defined; part of him was a nebula that trailed behind them frantically and thoughts kept straying and sending pulses everywhere. It was obviously a more than decent first try.

“Why did you make that mediocrity?” Loki said judgmentally anyway.

“What? Mimic you? Because I didn’t know if I could and it looks cool. Shall we start the tour? Ok, on the right side we have Natasha Romanova, sleeping Gandalf style, on the left, we have Clint and Steve and on the back Brucie and Thor. Pep, Janet and Coulson live too far to be seen from here. No flash, please.”

Loki was looking at his brother, confused by how big his presence was. Being turned into human made it easier for him to have his own space, but to grow like that, one had to learn. Thor had learnt?

“Look, this is what I remember the first time we saw him.” Stark had noticed Loki’s focus of interest, the image he pulled from his own memory was much smaller. “This is a day after we met him.” Thor’s presence had grown considerably. “This is after Coulson put Jane in his way.” Thor’s presence had had a growth spurt.

Loki couldn’t reign in his curiosity. “Why her?” Why had they known that woman would be able to get under Thor’s skin?

“We sent her the readings of your rainbow thing. She had an instant affinity, and she is terribly good turning interns with decent ideas into prospective good researchers.” Stark made a gesture that was probably meant to be a shrug, but only vaporized his shoulders. “We only sent Thor to explain some concepts, but she can recognize a good resource and exploit it.”

“Oh, I thought it had been a foolish story of falling in love instantly.”

Loki lost interest in his brother; he had seen more lines and pulses.

“He is built like a house, she is gorgeous, and they are interested in each other, but most of the time is a mentor thing between them.”

“And you know it because you _feel_ it.” Loki smirked.

“It is handy sometimes.”

Loki had found weavings and pulses that connected the humans he knew. There was a braid of particular interest, and it was stronger than the rest. Stark, eager to share everything he had learnt, proceeded to explain before Loki asked any question.

“One link is active when we play avengers, other when we use that other-dimensional powers, and the other… well, I’ve only seen it work when we act like a family. But that there is the reason why we came.”

Stark walked them to a construction, not too big, but strong looking. To the untrained eye, it looked like a statue. Loki recognized a construction of a binded-word spell, based on a perfect triangle of concept, referent, and representation. From there, intentions shaped the figure. Loki recognized the kind of patterns.

“Oh,” Loki said, realizing the problem.

“Oh?” Stark repeated.

“The deal is solid. Your world is logic, like your sciences, but also evolving. Therefore, your way of thinking imitates the world. It is far more resilient than an Asgardians’ mindset, used to believing uncertainties and accepting the word of the king without question.”

Loki touched where he reached, testing for fissures. He recognized his part in it instantly and he was surprised to see that it was very similar to the humans' side. It was full of loopholes and twists. In comparison, Thor stood out like a sore thumb; his word was rigid, unbending, and strong.

"What do you think?" Stark wasn’t looking at the structure, he had probably memorized it already.

"Thor is the weakest link, he didn't understand what he was agreeing to.” Loki checked the part where Thor’s will and someone else’s joined. Different materials were hard to join and hard to keep together, any crafter in the Nine knew that. “You, humans, are,” Loki pulled and the design bent to adapt, with the exception of Thor’s part, again. “flexible. Your way of thinking is interesting and open. Apparently, humans learn to be tricksters very early.” Loki saw the structural tension in the joined parts grow with the slightest pressure. “Do you all hate rules?”

“Pretty much, yeah. From Clint to Steve, we are all known for insubordination here or there.”

Loki could admire such a free way of thinking, but it was natural. Humans had all that space to dream, invent... Asgard had to draw energy from the astral plane because of its unbalanced nature, humans had the chaos in their minds, Asgardians didn’t have space or certainty to evolve.

"But it can’t be modified, despite the bendy bits.” Stark pointed at how there were no loose ends to work with.

"We could cut Thor out cleanly, and work with those loose ends.”

Loki kneeled in front of Thor's part and touched what his brother had pinned on it. He sensed a kind of camaraderie, less servile than the Warriors Three, more critic, less mindlessly accepting. Cutting it now would imply a destruction as bad as losing Loki’s memories. Loki traced with his eyes the links to Thor. Cutting his ties was both unacceptable and the only solution.

Loki couldn’t choose. It was once again Thor or Loki, and only one could be happy. Thor had already grown something significant in Midgard. Unlike Loki, who had tried to stay as detached as possible. Midgard was meaningful for both of them. Thor was learning through human experience what Loki had never been able to teach him with words.

_Learning through experience. Thor._

“Stark!” Loki Shouted suddenly. “We are doing this wrong. _I_ have been doing this wrong! Of course Thor is still Thor; he always reacts better to actions than to words! We need to go back, you will help me.”

Stark said something sarcastic about Loki not being the boss of him, but he took them back with the ensuing disorientation. Stark had seen the structure before; he had said that a change would create a black hole, but that wasn’t true. A change would simply unravel Thor. By how hastily Stark took them back, he hadn’t wanted to hurt Thor any more than Loki.

 Loki opened his eyes; he was laying on the couch, the light had been turned off, and there was a pair of arms around him, preventing Loki from face-planting on the floor. Huh, maybe there was a reason for the holding, after all.

Loki sat up, Stark following suit, and he realized there was a tingle in his hands that he wasn't producing. He rose his hand, which was glowing faintly green. Stark's blue-white energy was intertwined in his fingers, meshing with the green light in his palm; it felt stronger than his own, but that was to be expected, with the tower still hindering him.

The link had to be what Stark had used to transport their consciousness, and now that it was no longer useful, Loki was sad to see it untangling. The slowly dimming show of lights gave their faces an eerie look.

Loki only jumped back into action when he realized Stark was awake too, and watching him playing with the strange and alluring magic.

"We will need the rest of the night, the coldest item you can find and a lot of repetitions," Loki said quickly to avoid any admission that could stop his plan.

During the rest of the night, Stark introduced Loki to cryogenic liquids and Loki introduced him to Jotuns. Stark was as curious about it as he had been about the magic, no more and no less, but Loki had expected that reaction. It was the reason why Stark was present; he balanced Loki’s disgust. There he had someone who wasn’t afraid, merely _weirded out,_ by the sight, and Loki used that to tell himself a Jotun body alone didn’t make him a monster.

They repeated the cooling and warming up several times so the concealing spell would wear out and Loki could gain control over it. However, with the skin came Jotun abilities that stayed with Loki in his own body. Loki realized in that moment the reason why his ice spells had never worked and cursed Odin again, this time for messing with his magic.

***

_He made room for himself between Loki and the back of the couch._

_Stark was sitting on his heels,_ _with a knee on either side of Loki’s hips_

_and the tips of his fingers hovering an inch from Loki’s head. (...)_

_"Think of think of your body pressed against me and every warm spot,_

_think of my breath on your neck."_

_***_


	14. Ice Bridge

The laboratory didn’t have windows, so they didn’t realize it was morning until Phil came looking for them, because everyone had already gathered to see the final showdown. Luckily, Loki had been at a warm stage at the moment. The three of them got out of the elevator at the same time as Clint entered the common room. He came from Stark’s room with unlit firecrackers in his hand and the scowl of a foiled toddler. He handed Phil a note of human currency.

“Let’s start before I lose any more money,” he whined.

Even Virginia had taken some time from her business. Loki had a sense of repetition, seeing all of them together, distributed in the room. But the resemblance to his first day on Earth was only superficial. Loki didn’t feel like summoning knives, Thor wasn’t cheerfully ignorant of the consequences of his actions, and Stark was no longer the sprawled man; he was standing before Loki with a rough plan for their conversation.

Loki shut out their audience, who were mostly playing at pretending to ignore them. He was in a good mood and the grin he shared with Stark told him that he wasn’t the only one. The plan could be madness, but they wouldn’t have it any other way.

"This will be interesting," Stark rubbed his hands, looking sideways at Thor.

"I don’t think so,” Loki crossed his arms. “I could defeat you blindfolded."

"Let me guess, and with your hands tied behind your back. I think you understood this backwards, Kitten."

"So I don’t win if it’s me who charms the pants out of you?"

"I think we both win if you manage that."

They kept going because it was blatantly angering Thor, and making him remember that Loki was his baby brother. Loki was annoyingly hard to control when he was feeling uncooperative. Thor had never stopped trying to force Loki to be the brother he wanted to have, despite Loki proving time and again the foolishness of such attempts. Thor's huff confirmed that he was going to try once again.

"What are you doing, Loki? You have been dismissive with every lover. You are wasting our time."

"No, brother, my lovers simply stayed as far away from your bed and your earshot as they could, unsurprisingly." It wasn’t a lie; the few lovers Loki had had in Asgard avoided Thor like a smelly bog.

That didn’t stop Thor from scoffing. "The rumor at court says you are a fastidious tease who wouldn’t know how to satisfy a woman even if you were equipped to do so."

Loki was well aware of the rumors; _ergy_ was a word that hid many stories. Loki had never expected to hear one of them from Thor, but that only meant that Loki was getting to him. That knowledge didn’t make Thor’s laughing face hurt any less.

Stark drew a rivulet on Loki’s nape with a finger; Loki’s brain went haywire, forgetting about careless words. Stark faced Thor too, with an arm over Loki’s shoulders. “Your whole court can go suck a dick and forget about the equipment they are not sucking.” He turned to Loki conspiratorially, but loud enough to be overheard. "In Asgard, it’s boast or it didn’t happen or something?"

"They have many rules about what is proper. Not enough partners is not proper in a young man of the royal family.” Loki explained in a volume that made the conversation more private. “It is interesting enough that he hasn’t mentioned that you are a man. Jane must have changed that already."

Stark frowned and lowered his tone to be a real whisper. "If he so much as implies that there is something wrong with this besides exhibitionism, I’ll find a way to make his hammer unresponsive, not the flying one."

Loki didn’t want to think about that sordid image, so he focused on the other interesting thing of the sentence.

“Exhibitionism?”

Stark, standing behind, slithered a hand down Loki’s front in a way that, coupled with Loki's clothes, made the move look innocent to most of the room, while the other snaked around his hip over the clothes. The hand touching skin directly at the front didn’t move except for a lazy stroke of the thumb on his lower abdomen. Stark rasped his beard against Loki’s neck, which meant that he had to be on his tiptoes even if Loki couldn’t see it.

“Maybe. It’s up to you.” It sounded directly against Loki’s ear shell.

Loki pushed with his hip against Stark’s body.

“ _Up_ to me, you say?”

Stark chuckled.

“What do you find so funny?”

Stark stepped directly in front of Loki, still moving his hands so as not to lose contact.

“I could keep going and you wouldn’t stop me, would you?” Loki didn’t see any harm in playing with Stark’s hair, so he didn’t stop when his hands went to do just that. “Even knowing what that would mean for you, you still would let me in; let me _own_ your soul.” Indeed Stark made it sound appealing. “And what I find funny is that you wouldn’t do it in exchange for a moment of pleasure, you wouldn’t even do if for an eternity of ecstasy.” Stark’s words were languid, Loki didn’t need to interrupt him.

“You crave a different kind of satisfaction, which is also mine. It is not lust what makes you work, it is not what could be your undoing if it was unchecked.” He smirked in that way that made Loki wonder what was going to happen. “From the moment you walked in, I knew you were mine, Loki, because you burn with constant curiosity, and curiosity is my favorite feeling. Right now, if I wanted to, I could tear your resistance simply offering some answers. I could destroy your plans, tempt you away from the world. I know that some part of you is still considering giving in, I can feel it.”

Loki knew that he was right. In that moment Loki could live and die happily if Stark stayed by his side, sharing magic findings, learning Midgard, learning humans; one human, in depth, sating his endless curiosity. Loki would be tempted to test more of his limits with Stark, to relearn his new body next to the human.

Loki gulped. So that was what they meant when Bruce said that Stark was more than Lust. Curiosity, indeed, could be his undoing. Alas, he couldn’t give in… yet. There was much to do, to protect his soul and his future.

“I’m afraid I have to refuse,” saying those words was almost physically painful.

“I’ll have to improve my offer then.”

“What do you mean?” improve? They hadn’t planned this.

“Be mine. You; not your soul. Spread curiosity like a disease. Go down through streets you don’t know, check how fast you can drive, eat things you’ve never seen, read new things, indulge in your wanderlust; go to the last frontier, then come back to me and share it. You know what I do, now do it with me.”

Loki felt tension increase tenfold. He didn’t know if it was magic of some kind, or if it had something to do with how he was holding his breath, but he honestly didn’t care. He should worry in case it was a trap, in case Stark still wanted to ‘keep him’, but worry had dissolved somewhere in the last hours.

Instead of answering, he kissed Stark. It was sweet, far too quick, and uncoordinated, but it held so many doubts. There were gasps and comments behind them, but he didn’t care. When they separated, there was a well of hope that Loki hadn’t expected to find in someone as cocksure as Stark.

“That wasn’t a yes, though,” he said a little breathless.

Loki touched Stark’s forehead with his own and huffed a laugh. It was a strange feeling in retrospect: it had only been a few days and suddenly the human was offering… what exactly? It wasn’t exactly lust and it wasn’t exactly something more. It was a bond built on freedom and a wish of fulfilled chimeras.

 _Be mine_ Stark had said, and it didn’t sound like an exclusive ownership. Stark made it sound like the nebula of ideas that he cultivated in the astral plane: be my inspiration, be my obsession, be my axis, my root and my sail, be my companion, be my friend, be for me. Loki already knew that Stark was fond of unsaid words.

He didn’t know how much Stark could really read of his wishes, so he decided on some words to give voice to a part of what was going on in his mind.

“ _Yes_ is too simple a word. You shall be mine too, drive to that frontier by my side and keep tricks and mischief as your allies in all your endeavours, Tony.”

Stark didn’t voice a direct answer, but Loki didn’t need one. Stark’s eyes lit up like a forest in autumn, with brownish and golden tones. Then, just like in those humid woods, reality started to rain on them again, the world seemed to leap forward, and they got soaked in cold words.

“That was actually worse than the fondling.”

“What happened? Did Loki lose?”

“About time.”

“Phil, I think Tony has just made a priest of his own religion. Is he allowed to do that, am _I_ allowed to do that?”

 “I think that’s the kind of thing that doesn’t happen twice, Clint. And no, Thor, whatever it was, it wasn’t a claim.”

At the name of his brother, Loki knew he couldn’t delay the confrontation. He breathed in and out, stole a soft caress of Stark’s jaw and braced himself with a look before turning to Thor.

“Fine, Thor, you force me to leave my words aside.”

“No, Loki, don't try. I’m sorry you have to give up your-”

“Listen, Thor. Forget everything I have told you these days. Odin lied to us, I’m technically dead for all of Asgard, Odin has announced my death.”

“What?” Finally a reaction, a wary one, but it was more than the constant negative during the last week.

“I can’t even go back because our fellow citizens have been told to kill anyone who looks like me upon sight.”

“Why?”

“Thor, Odin is out of his mind, and mother is there with him.”

“That… has nothing to do with me anymore.” No, that wasn’t what Loki intended. Before Loki could shock him, he had to understand. Stark was by his side, just as antsy as Loki.

“I’m not finished, Thor. Listen to me without interrupting.”

“I’m listening.”

“As I was saying, Odin has gotten rid of me, because I found the lie he has been telling us all our lives.” Loki focused on the previous night and the feeling of cold. It wasn’t hard to tap into it once he knew how to find the spell. “I am a frost giant.”

There was an uncomfortable silence. Nobody moved, nobody breathed, nobody attacked...

“What?!” Thor gripped his hammer tightly. “No, brother, I’ve held you when you were barely a baby, you can’t, this must be part of your shapeshift-”

Loki had expected that, so he shot ice at the ground. “You know I was never able to summon ice magic. Look at that spike, Thor. Seidr spells of ice make spirals, not shards. If you offer your arm to be frostbitten, I can show you more,” Loki said, slowly losing his patience. “I’m a Jotun.”

Thor looked at those red eyes and Loki fretted. He hadn’t hit Loki yet, which was good news, and he hadn’t questioned if he was Loki, which was even better, but what really calmed Loki was that Thor had slipped up and called him _brother_.

“Am I?” Thor asked unexpectedly.

“Be what?” Loki asked, bemused.

“A Jotun, or something else.”

“I… I don’t know.” Loki was not only surprised but shocked. Thor was Odin’s favourite, it had to mean something, right? Maybe... What if he wasn't Frigga's son. “I didn’t have time to ask. Why would you doubt? You are the heir.”

“I am not blind, brother.” Thor sounded bored, as if Loki should have guessed. “Odin, Frigga, Bor; they all steer seidr masterfully. It is very unusual that their offspring would be born without magical talent. Lately I’ve seen that Odin taught me not to be a wise king, but an obedient one. That made me think about many things.”

Thor posed an unexpectedly valid question. It showed how much Thor had learnt and grown when Loki wasn’t looking. Thor needed to come back to Midgard, even if he shouldn’t stay trapped in it.

“This can’t stay a mystery, father owes us an explanation. I… can’t ignore this. Friends, I’m afraid Loki’s words have some truth to them: for now, my place is in Asgard, asking the questions Loki couldn’t pose before he was exiled. I won’t be able to come back for some time, but don’t worry, I’ll find a way back to you.”

He walked to the balcony with his cape sweeping the floor and not saying goodbye. The repaired crystal door closed behind him, his voice came muffled to them, shouting for Heimdall. A moment later the balcony was empty.

Loki could hardly believe it: Thor was gone, he could keep his memories, and his brother hadn't killed him on sight. Stark put an arm around him; he could keep his memories of Midgard, maybe even stay, get to know Stark, take root in their astral plane. However, the world kept turning around him.

“What is the plan?” Clint said while stretching on the armchair. The question was directed at the room at large, but Phil and Steve were paying more attention.

“To teach him to be human when he comes back, then teach him to be an Avenger, and finally offer him the position of Pride when, and only when, he is ready to do something good with it. I’ll go to break the news to Jane." He looked at Loki. "And I have four fools lost in the desert who need to be told that their prince is in another castle.”

“Was that a reference, agent?" Stark clapped. "It was! Someone bring the alcohol!”

"What about the Avengers? What about humans?" Bruce worried.

"You ask where humanity is going, Bruce?" Steve asked teasingly.

"The intergalactic war," Natasha spared Bruce the repetition.

"We can't do anything," Phil said with a regretful tone.

"I can."

All were surprised by Loki's words. If they thought Loki was going to be Stark's trophy, tamed thing, there was a surprise waiting for them.

"I can show you the paths and I can teach you to hide, so you can act and keep humanity hidden for now." It wasn’t hard to predict what they would want; it was a matter of offering, in exchange for something else.

"That's interesting, but we'll need more planning." Phil consulted his watch; he needed to leave and Virginia had a meeting. Further discussion would have to wait. Loki didn’t mind; it would give him time to choose what he was going to ask for.

“And what is the plan for us?” Stark looked crookedly at Loki.

“ _Us,_ huh?” Loki intoned with doubt. The Avengers might have wanted to linger and ask questions, but Stark had effectively made the room unbearably uncomfortable for them, so they were alone in a matter of seconds. “Give me a reason to stay, Tony.” Loki liked very much the way Stark looked at him when he used his given name.

“I live here! Isn’t that enough?”

“Your living arrangements are no concern of mine. I want more for me, now that I’m allowed to be greedy again.”

“I want more too, but that is my permanent state. I think I should do something to concern you with my living arrangements, like introducing you to my bedroom, and there will be a dinner date in the short term future. Not necessarily in that order. How does that sound to you?”

Even if whatever Stark offered eventually turned sour -a turn of events that Loki's nature didn't let him ignore entirely- Loki intended to extract as much joy of it as he could, and soak in the experience.

“It sounds sinfully tempting.”

 

 


End file.
